I Am So Rusty (Answering Questions)

I did remember to say Greetings & Salutations. Everything else... Let's just say I giggled at the Q & A Video for this post. Gosh, I can be long-winded. Oh Well!!!

Q: I Saw This and I Thought About What Would You Say... Do You Agree With the Text Sender?

A: Stuff like this is why there is still a written portion on Q &A posts. A few profane terms came to mind after reading this. I can not believe that this is a thing to stop seeing someone for. That person was not ever going to be in it for the long haul. I would cut my losses & Thank the Lord the foolishness reared its ugly head now. And yes, I will erase numbers & any other forms of communication, immediately. My urge to eat the honey wheat brown bread at Cheesecake Factory as soon as it hits the table and I don't need that kind of negativity. "Wait Five Minutes" The bread could get cold by then. He should've taken 5 minutes and grammar-checked that text message. Like doesn't his phone's shift/cap button work. *sigh* Let me stop before I use the words dumb & the a-word in this answer. No, I don't agree with the text sender.

This Post's Q & A Video

Can't see the video, Click HERE

Watch the Rules to Cheating Discussion HERE. Remember the 1st rule is "Don't Cheat".

Please forgive me for the long-winded rambling. *smiling*

Don't forget, if you have any questions, email them to C.OUT.SPOKEN.DIVA@gmail.com or leave them in the comment section below or on the social media site where you see this post. I will answer them.

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As Always Talking to You in Adult Terms!

 

Talk About It Tuesday (Stranger Danger, Get Your Kids)

Because Outspoken_Diva tries to be a nice Adult Citizen. Keyword is...

As Always Talking to You in Adult Terms

Talk About It Tuesday (Taxes, Stimulus, Lottery)

Mind Your Business!!! And don't tell me..."You First".

As Always Talking to You in Adult Terms!

How to Make a Baby Spice

There are clear hot sauces, FYI

Like a long-winded preacher, I won't be before you long.

Instagram Model Says Drake Puts Hot Sauce In His Used Condoms After Sex, Plans To Sue Him... Yes, that is a headline. Go read it HERE. 

Now, you guys know I am here not to talk about the salaciousness. I'm not even sure how true any of this is. If it is, she is wrong for trying to get pregnant & "trap" this celebrity.

She wouldn't have had hot sauce anywhere near her genitals if she wasn't trying to do some mess. Also, if it is true I want to know who told Drake about this foolishness. I know it can't be a responsible sexual health-educated person who is doling out this info.

And that is why I am here. The lack of safe sex practices not being used makes me nervous. I am afraid to know if this is really happening in these sexual intercourse streets. Hot Sauce doesn't belong on any part of the body but the tongue. 

Anything with peppery spices may cause a burning sensation when placed on delicate areas like your vagina or the head of his penis. And if anyone is concerned about killing sperm, use spermicidal condoms, lubes, & foams. When rinsing out condoms was trending, I took the time to price those & non-spermicidal condoms. They Don't Cost That Much. Also, health agencies give out spermicidal kind. The products are out there...Do Not Do Stupidity To & With Your Body. Kids do cost money and vaginosis & stinging penis openings hurt. Be Safe & Responsible.

And if this story is false...Still Don't Put Hot Sauce in Condom & Sneakily Try to Get Pregnant. It's Not Worth It!!!

As Always Talking to You in Adult Terms!

A Nice Red (Book Review)

We all just want to be Whole. Especially us Fast Little Church girls who wear "All That Red" lipstick. When my mother found that I was interested in wearing lipstick, she bought me a tube of fuchsia & a tube of red (Revlon's Certainly Red, the color she wore). The ladies in my home, my grandmother, mother, & sister wore their preferred various shades of red (and other colors) lipstick that looked good on them when they dressed up. And the day they dressed up the most was Sunday. Because on Sunday, they were going to church. That is where the church clerks, ushers, deaconesses, mission sisters, and assistant youth directors can be found. But that was the very place I found out I was fast and/or too grown for wearing something my mother bought me. Oh Yes, of course, the place I call on this blog, Foundation Church had some finger-wagging church folks in it, that disapproved of the young female congregants wearing red lipstick (& that color nail polish, and getting their hair done in a salon aka things I did) like some of the other houses of worship in the Christian religion. It was almost a decade later for me to learn & understand about church folks' beliefs & feelings (All racist, colorist, & misogynistic based) about red-colored female lips. But it did not take that long to find the shades of red that match me.

So reading Red Lip Theology: For Church Girls Who've Considered Tithing to the Beauty Supply Store When Sunday Morning Isn't Enough by Candice Benbow had to be right up my alley. Benbow according to the internet is a theologian, essayist, columnist, baker, and educator whose work gives voice to Black women’s shared experiences of faith, healing, and wholeness. I first heard of her talking about Jay-Z's 4:44 album on a few podcasts. But when she spoke about sexuality and the church with popular Youtuber, KevOnStage was when I became a fan.

In this book, whose chapter titles are patterned like makeup application steps, starting with Skin Care, she gives voice to her beginnings as the daughter of a single mother and an absentee father attending a Black Baptist church. In the 1st four chapters, the quote, "I am Not My Sister's Keeper, I am My Sister" kept shadowing my reading. Many of her experiences sounded familiar to the young church girl tales of my own & others I grew up with. Other essays talk about her lessons surrounding adultery, feminist/womanist beginnings, theology experiences, and her feelings about the controversial term, "soul ties"(Let's just say my feelings spoken in a Q & A video on here are not far off). And I do a curtsey to this author for teaching me a term for my personal vocabulary. That "Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner" reasoning the church loves to use for "allowing" gay folks in "their" congregations has a great proper name. Candice Benbow ends her work by talking about grieving & living life without her beloved mother, Debra in recent years. She pens it with a final letter. It is good like the feel-good fan air blown after the book's Setting Spray. But this entire work's heart spoke to her mom and more than likely to her grandmother & other mother figures lovingly well. If I were to use makeup term, let's say it is Beat for the Gawds!

One day sociologists will look fully into why we, ladies (especially us, Black ladies) take less time to find our perfect shades of red for our complexions than to break from doctrines, theologies & religious ideologies that don't serve & mistreat us. I hope this book gets referenced. Because just like finding that "right red", many of us "fast & too grown" church girls found or are finding our own ways to worship God. And we found that the lip colors of our female family members & others within personal communities didn't match exactly to our paths to worshiping & beliefs about God & his love. And that is Okay. Red Lip Theology: For Church Girls Who've Considered Tithing to the Beauty Supply Store When Sunday Morning Isn't Enough is one woman's journey. And it is a trip worth watching her take.

Now, will Sunday be a Revlon's Cherries in the Snow or Gash by Urban Decay day for me? My church outfit needs a pop of color.

As Always Talking to You in Adult Terms!

Some Folks Need Mental Shapewear

Teenage me is screaming!!! I was at the front door to pick up a delivery and hear THIS story on the TV. I have been plus size. My body was policed so much growing it is almost comical. I think subconsciously have always dressed the way I do to buck this man-made fashion system that tells me I am only supposed to wear long, all-black, or floral print clothing. I know somewhere on here, I discussed me almost getting sent home from school before the 1st bell because I wouldn't tuck in my shirt. HERE it is. I was fingertip & ruler check about a skirt or a dress length a few times in school in the 90s. But the incident still annoys me. Thank God for my school counselor.

But yet here we are in another century and yet adults in charge of children at schools are still policing bodies. If you didn't read the article, counselors at a Mississippi middle school sent a letter home with the female students talking about concerns about the self-images with young ladies. And to aid in helping these girls, could they provide shapewear, underwear, & bras for the students. *deep sigh* I told you Teenage is screaming. Mostly the word, "Still". 

But I have to tell Teenage me, " Yeah, Still". Yeah, common sense should say, "When does a girdle give anyone a better self-view"? I wear shapewear. Been wearing it for almost 30 years, I think. That was what was at my door. It just makes you look smoother in your clothing.

It doesn't do anything to improve negative self-images in your mind. Also, do we think info like bra sizes of young women needs to be shared with the school admin? These are still humans and People are Judgemental. As soon as a student with a 40I bust turn in her form, Dollar to Donuts somebody at least thought, "Oh My God, Dang She's Big". Remember I lived that life. Some Adults can be worse than children. And finally, let's talk about child pedophilia. Perverts come in both sexes and aren't always on a state list. If I was a parent wouldn't want to aid in anyone preying on my student because of the info I provided. Sounds extreme until the guidance counselor is in handcuffs because they led their way to a child's body by saying they got more undergarments for them.

The school counselors may have had good intentions. But there are healthier ways to promote positive self-images into the minds of the student body. I say let's go old school and start with videos & discussion with the students. Find out where their heads are at. And I said students without assigning gender-specific adjectives to that word. And I will leave that sentence there.

This is #10 on the Why I am Childless List...The Unbelievable!

As Always Talking to You in Adult Terms!