Let’s Talk About Male Stripper, Male Revue…Movies

Okay I know I have some new readers. My viewing numbers are up and that is great. Amazingly enough, the gossip numbers are the same so maybe the number of non-nosy non- blabber mouth readers are up. LoL But before you read this blog some of you might want to go read THIS, THIS, and THIS. I don’t want anyone shocked. So, you have been told to prepare yourself.

So, with the success of the movie Magic Mike,

there will be a sequel to it and a movie featuring the realm of black male strip clubs called, Chocolate City. A guy wrote about the lack of diversity in Magic Mike in this ARTICLE and the idea for this movie was born. The movie is about a college guy who gets pulled into the world of stripping by a club owner and the veteran dancer who worries the youngsters are taking his limelight. Like the other movie, 

I probably won’t see Chocolate City in the theaters and will wait until it comes to cable stations like HBO, Showtime, EPIX, BET, Centric or Aspire. Why because everybody else will be there to see the men, I being a movie purist will be going for a storyline. And like Magic Mike (Yeah it (storyline & dancing) was boring to me, too), Chocolate City, I bet will have more attention paid to the eye candy than the screenplay. I can look at the actor’s pictures at home for free.

So, does there need to be an all-black cast male revue movie? I know everything is so racial these days. Yet if the truth is told, there is a difference in predominately white & predominately black male strip clubs or revues. I’ve been to both. First, a few times to Labares (a white club) when I was under 21 and to the world of black male revues after I graduated college. I was shocked at the difference. The culture of both clubs are unalike.

There is a cover charge. I’ve been to a “free” show once, be very afraid. Either there are dressing rooms or male restrooms where the dancers get dressed in.  Both have a staging area, a DJ, seating, tables, and bar areas. Latecomers may have to stand (Been there and that is not cute). There is a dancer on stage and dancers are working the crowd also. Both have flyers passed inside and outside of the club. And interesting enough not as many falling down drunk women as pop culture makes you believe. There is a crowd favorite maybe 2 or 3. They usually have a more elaborate set with props & equipment like pools & chairs. There is a new guy there. He’s mostly dancing and doing tricks and usual first or behind one of the favorite. The guy that makes you wonder why is he up there is there too.  

Clubs like Labares or Chippendales are similar to the Magic Mike. The opening group dance, the scheduled sets, and the stereotypical costumes with tear-away pants to boot. The stage area has a very exclusive feel. You throw your dollar and might engage with the dancer for a moment and you move on. Big tippers pay for private dancing or tip every dancer on the stage (yeah those chicks are funny). Private dances are like off to the side or maybe in an exclusive area. Dancers may bring up an audience member during their set but if they don’t, don’t be surprised.

Black shows are very casual, like an enlarged bachelorette party at home. Punctuality is an option (I'll say it, one of my major pet peeves with these shows) with these guys. Never seen an opening group number (have a few theories) at a black male revue. The costumes are not as a pop culture defined.

I’ve seen a few cavemen & masked men but never a cop or firefighter. Costume varies. I saw slaves, candy bar outfits, thugs but nothing stereotypical to male strippers. I’ve seen a lot of chains, whistles, baby oil, ice cream, vibrators, fire tricks, swings, & motorcycles. Crowd participation is encouraged and most of the dancers will bring an audience member to the stage to be part of the act. Some are asked to prior. Many are not. The unsuspecting audience member on stage can be entertaining. Sometimes the host of the show may engage a lady while he’s talking while the next act is getting ready. Private lap dances are private because they are taken off stage. Never had one so I can’t tell you that.

How do I know?

Well, I get bored and I pay attention to stuff that is not on the stage. look, every dancer is not somebody I want to watch.

Oh, and I can’t keep going to the bathroom to avoid boredom. No Male Revue holds my attention that well that my mind and eyes don’t wander. You see this stuff. Also, women talk and some of this stuff is on YouTube.

Oh well, I hope Chocolate City does well. I hope it sticks to the culture of an all-black club and not a reboot of Magic Mike. The stories are different that is what I expect, A Different Distinction. Here to you guys telling about it!!!

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Another Series...What I Wear

I talked about my makeup, skin, & hair. Now people want me to talk about my clothing style. So, I will take the time to talk about my clothes. The series will be called, “What I Wear”. I will break each segment up by Dress & Skirts, Tops, Bottoms (jeans & skirts excluded), Jeans, Intimates, Shoes, and Outerwear & Accessories.

Umm my clothing style is what I call classic and charming.I always have (that me in high school in the burgundy)
By today dressing standards, other than when going grocery shopping & a few churches, I am actually overdressed. I just refuse to go out socially in jeans & flip flops and sneakers all the time. I just don’t understand being so casual all the time. I prefer a more spruced up look. So if I am overdressed, then I am overdressed.

Also when I say I dress classically. I still follow many dressing traditions. Some I've already talk about in previous post and I know they will come up again in the Intimates section. But yes, there are some things I still do that many have stop doing. I still follow the white rule. I only wear white (Not ivory, cream, ecru, pearl, and mother of pearl. White like Easter lily or Fresh Untouched Snow) bottoms, dresses & shoes between the time period of Easter and Labor Day. I don’t wear and actually frown upon sock & sandals. My mother made me wear those as a preschool aged child to VBS and I thought it was stupid. I don’t wear jackets & shorts. Are you cold or are you hot? Pick one a temperature and commit. I wear leggings are worn as hosiery. Also, tunics are tops not dresses.

I do break some “rules”. As a plus size women, I am not afraid of color. Matter of fact, people have to required me to wear all black outfits.

My Bestie Boo, LJ invited me to his birthday party boat one year and waited until after I accepted his invite to tell me the dress code of all black. That’s how adamant I am about wear all-black. (I know the black didn't match. Shush!!!)
If I wear black, I try to find the brightest colors I can to accent it. I refuse to believe I am too big to wear a color or a print.
My favorite colors are pink, blue, yellow and white. I own lots of those colors too, especially white. I actually own more white tops than the law should allow.

 
 
I also will wear a dress and a pair of pants together in the winter time.
Neckties & Necklaces have been worn as belts. I have worn belts are necklaces.

I’m not a clothing whore. I actually hate shopping. (That's my dislike face)

 It's a tedious chore to keep my body covered. For the most part (80%), I don’t dress trendy. Trends make me dislike shopping. Trends cost a lot of money to keep up with. I like classic pieces that never go out of style. But when I have to shop for a classic piece, I have to sift through the trends. That is frustrating. 60% of my clothing shopping is done online. I have trust places that I shop at so, I know buying online from them will work for me. 30% of my shopping offline is for some of my intimate wear, shoes from places or brands I’m not sure of and non-clip earrings accessories. Maybe I’ll talk about where I shop. Keyword is maybe. If I shop for trends, I scour clearance and sale sections. I can wait until all the fashion slaves get through buying stuff at marked up prices at the beginning of the season. Then around the end of the midseason I started watching the price lower to a price I feel is proper to pay. That's when I buy trends. Rather late than never is my rule.

Hope you guys enjoy this journey through my closest. Leave any questions you have in the comments.

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

My Childhood is Over...Goodbye to Andre'

Well I knew this day would come. I had to accept that my security pillow could not be fluffed anymore and I broke down and bought a new body pillow.

Andre Lester Hayward had been in my possession since I was nine. He was originally my brother's body pillow. Andre' was given to after his last back surgery he had when I was five. My brother never really liked it so I commandeered it. The pillow was cute and yellow and was my size. I loved laying on the pillow. It was like a cloud to me. Andre became my security pillow. . Andre has dried many of my tears. I have hugged him through many trials & tribulations in my life. He even endured the happy joyous scream of exciting news. Every sleepover & college I went to, he went He was right there. Don't asked me why I named him. You will have to find nine year old me and ask her.

I don't have the heart to throw him away. I am going to add him another pillow in another case. But that picture will be the last time my head directly touches that pillow.

The new pillow has arrived. It's pretty comfortable and I think it will keep my body aligned at night.

In tradition to that nine year old I will name the pillow. The name shall be Conrad Chase Hayward. Hope Conrad is as relaxing as Andre. Hopefully Andre is on my bed schooling him on my emotions.

Night Night Andre'!!!

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Women Hitting Men Discussions (I Blame Pop Culture)

 I don't understand people who can not Use Their Words in an argument. The first thing they do when they are losing is start hitting someone. Some folks act as those that is the only reaction they have.  Many of those are women. It behooves me that I live in a society that does not see these women that unjustly put their hands on men. It behooves me that some people don't understand the sentiment of statements of Whoopi Goldberg

or Stephen A. Smith. I didn't say I agree exactly with either Goldberg or Smith. Goldberg's statement doesn't stop the violence.  And I've already spoke about the Smith's

generalized rant in a previous blog. But I wholeheartedly understand what they are saying. I agree with the underlying ideas of what they have said. Smith tried but failed majorly.We need to confront and/or punish these women who think it is okay to hit men.They actually think they are immune to punishments & consequences.

Oh there is a culture of nasty little women that feel like because they are female and it is taught that a man can't hit a woman that they think they can hit a man and there will be no consequence.

Let me describe a situation. A man is late coming home from work. They had plans to play cards with other men & women in their home. His wife and he started arguing about his tardiness. The argument gets heated. The others are looking. The man suggests they go into the bedroom to discuss the issue. The wife says "I'm not going anywhere". The husband tries to proceed to the bedroom. She says "Where are you going? I'm not through talking about this". Then she pushes him in the head. He walks off and goes into the bedroom. She follows him and still wanting to argue. The guest are just sitting there discussing what they just witness. The wife is heard pushing her husband  and saying "What you want to hit me back".  Eventually the husband leaves the house to cool off.

Why did she hit him? What about the woman's consequences? She gets to hit him because he was late and she is mad and embarrassed. Nobody is going to stop her.

Sad part is society and pop culture actually protects her. A woman hits a man. If that man press charges on her. He is call a derogatory names like wuss & punk. Not a victim. Just like some of the people like the police officer in the video. So yeah, some of these guys snap and hit hit back or worse. Then, they go to jail. It's like a crazy Catch 22 scenario. Of all the double standards that are female favorable and it would be this grossness.

What is wrong with telling women not to put their hands on men? What is wrong with telling women to keep their hands & feet off of other people? Men are People too. My mother & grandmother taught me to keep my hands to myself. I teach my 18 year old niece & my eight year old nephew the same thing.

No Human has the Right to Hit, Punch, Slap, or Kicking another Human unless it is in Self-Defense or they are being legally paid to do so. Don't know how to fight without your extremities, Get Away from Each Other. If you  Hit, Punch, Slap, or Kicking another person, there should be lawful consequences.

Women are humans so, they do not have that right either. Pop culture has it wrong. Instead of attacking those who are trying their best to speak on and against this gross issue, they need help getting the message across.

Men shouldn't hit Women. Women shouldn't hit Men. Men shouldn't hit Men. Women shouldn't hit Women. People shouldn't hit People

Now I Said it!!!

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

The Dangers of the Generalization

What is a Generalization? It is a statement about a group of people or things that is based on only a few people or things. Most people learned about A and B, A is a "generalization" of B, and B is a special case of A, if and only if

• every instance of concept B is also an instance of concept A; and
• there are instances of concept A which are not instances of concept B

Okay let me make it more simple. An apple is a fruit but every fruit is not an apple. I learned that in elementary school. 

I said most people because it is apparent that with rise of people opening their mouths to give their opinions that are full of generalizations. The Latest Face of Generalization is Stephen A. Smith.

I read about his rant on “First Take,” the program on which he debates sports issues with Skip Bayless on ESPN about about the Ray Rice domestic abuse case & punishment. 

“In Ray Rice’s case, he probably deserves more than a 2-game suspension, which we both acknowledged. But at the same time, we also have to make sure that we learn as much as we can about elements of provocation. Not that there’s real provocation, but the elements of provocation, you got to make sure that you address them, because we've got to do is do what we can to try to prevent the situation from happening in any way. And I don't think that’s broached enough, is all I’m saying. No point of blame.”

 

I immediately looked just like he does when he hears someone else say something stupid. Yes, I believe Everyone should keep their hands to themselves. Men shouldn't hit Women. Women shouldn't hit Men. Men shouldn't hit Men. Women shouldn't hit Women. I believe everyone should defend themselves. I believe that Ray Rice's wife should not have hit him. I believe Ray Rice took it too far. I believe Ray Rice is only getting a slap on the hand with his reaction to his wife hitting him. 

But to say that a statement that could mean, women need to stop provoking men into abusing them, I don't stand behind that. Too many women are being abused everyday just because their abusers woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Stephen A Smith's statement was a generalization. A hasty & unsafe one at that. 

We all generalize and that is wrong. Black folks are poor and uneducated. Feminists are lesbians. White folks are rich racists. Illegal immigrants are Mexicans. Pastors only want their parishioners to marry other Christians only. Men want their wives barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen. Those are just a few I heard and read last week. I reposted this image on Facebook just last night to make a truthful point. 

That picture though true for some is still a generalization. Now clearly every woman does not stay in the wrong relationship that long. But many stay in the wrong relationship well passed the expiration date. Keyword is Some not All.

That is the problem with statements about a group of people or things that is based on only a few people or things. It unintentionally characterizes All and not the Some it only should define. Stephen A. Smith though he did state that Ray Rice was wrong and was justly punished should have made a statement that spoke to women who put their hands on men. His statement should have warned them that their are men that will retaliate in harsher ways than what they aggravated. A woman who hit anyone is exciting a quarrelsome issue.  His statement should not acknowledge anything about all women who are abused provoke their beating. Stephen A. Smith here is the lesson for you.

There are women who have been hit by men that hit the man first but all women who have been hit by men did not provoke anyone to hit her.

I think over the weekend Smith learned that lesson. He apologized on the air, today, Monday morning. 

"While elaborating on thoughts concerning the NFL's ruling versus Ray Rice following a domestic dispute with his then-fiancee, I ventured beyond the scope of our discussion by alluding to a woman's role in such heinous matters, going so far as to use the word "provoke" in my diatribe. My words came across that it is somehow a woman's fault. This was not my intent. It is not what I'm trying to say. Yet the failure to clearly articulate something different lies squarely on my shoulders. To say what I actually said was foolish is an understatement. To say I was wrong is obvious. To apologize to say I'm sorry, doesn't do the matter it's proper justice, to be quite honest. But I do sincerely apologize."

His most important sentence in his apology was. "Yet the failure to clearly articulate something different lies squarely on my shoulders". That is what happens when we generalize. We are not thinking while we are speaking. If we think before, while, and after we speak, our feet stay out of mouths. Slow down so you can use the proper words and stop being hasty in our opinions of  people and situations. 

Hey remember this rule A is a letter but All letters are not A.

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

On this Day (27th of July) in 2011...

I have been blogging on here for 3 years. I had so many topics running around in my head and No one at the time to talk to so I started a blog on a site that seems not to be going anywhere (had blogs on Myspace & Curvy Chick before) anytime soon. I don't regret doing a blog. I've learned a lot about myself (highs, lows, and between) and you guys my readers. I plan to keep going maybe delve in the world of Vlogging one day, even. But as long as I think I have something to talk about or they shut down Blogger.com this is where I be.

To my readers, each and everyone of you. 

So here your assignment (FBF that comment on FB and others who like to text me what they think cause they haven't figure out how to comment (Love you..but, Comment on the blog I'll see & answer on there, I promise, even f you go Anonymous (and stop being lazy :-)) (If you're on the mobile site (you know viewing the blog on your phone) hit "post a comment" IPhone & IPad user read this link http://www.johnlarge.co.uk/2013/01/26/problems-posting-comments-on-blogger-from-ios-ipad-safari-and-chrome/ for help) for the comment box. Over the past three years, what have you learn about and/or from me? Also what was your favorite blog up to date. What topics would you like me to discuss?

I love you all.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Black Jesus...Am I Going to Watch It?

Some of the content of this post may seem obscene or offensive to some readers. Viewer Discretion is Advised!!!

So Aaron McGruder, creator of The Boondocks has made a new show called Black Jesus. Since I am a fan of the original Boondock cartoon, I was asked by a bud if I would be watching this show. Though I tip my hat off to him for the creativity, I can't support him in watching this show.

I'm not so staunch that I don't laugh at jokes that takes jabs at religion.  I get the premise, it's quite clever. I love how this trailer made me to wonder if the Jesus character really the Messiah or is me a man who thinks he is Son of God. I like that there is opposition to him being here. If there was opposing view when he was first on Earth, I know there will be some if he came to live here now The premise almost got me to watch the pilot. Thank God for this extended trailer. I can't support a show with a weed smoking, liquor drinking, profanity using Jesus character. And did the Jesus character throw up in people's faces that he died for their sins? Boasting to get his way? Even if this comes out to be a man who think he's Jesus, I still want him not to be so earthly. Lastly, why is Black Jesus so stereotypically ignorant? He couldn't be funny without the shuck & jive. Yeah, a fan of Tyler Perry said the Black Jesus character is a bit buffoonish for her taste.

According to Romans 12:2, the New American Standard version, do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. If Christians, who are Christ like, are advised not to act like the world, why would this Jesus character come back to act worldly? I think it would be funny to see the hilarious calamity & misadventures of the current world with Jesus or someone who believes he is the Savior living here. I can some how awkward some of that could be. I just prefer my Jesus character to be delighted in shopping for fish & bread in a supermarket or wearing a few of the new fashions. I definitely can't envision him using his death, burial & resurrection as a means to take advantage. Even in the case of mental deluded person, some thing need to resemble the actions Jesus and not man.

So, that's my protest. I just won't watch the show. No signs needed!!! Just won't be getting Nielsen points from me. Let me know in the comments, will you be watch Black Jesus. Why or Why not?

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms