Just Pay and Stop the Debate

I see this topic often. I didn't even know gender roles & societal norms could influence such arguments like this one. This was never a dating lesson discussed in my home. This was never a gender role lesson for me growing up. Yet, the answer is common sense to me. I'm talking about the topic, "Who pays for the date? Him, Her, or Dutch?".

1st off unless a couple is at least eight months into a committed relationship(You should be close enough to make plans together & know a few one another's financials)

or have this discussed before going to the outing, Dutch is Never an option. I've never been asked to "Go Dutch". I hope I never experience that on a date. How do you invite someone, somewhere and expected them to help you foot the bill?

My answer is Him or Her. It depends on who asked who out. Who requested the date? That's who pays. I'll never open a door in the presence of a man, but if I asked him out I pay the bill. And I have several times. I remember asking Stumpy, the Worst Boyfriend Ever about his birthday plans. He had none.

So, I took him to Cheesecake Factory. He questioned me about the bill and I just chuckled. He didn't invite me to celebrate with him. I took him out, why would I expect him to pay? If a guy asks me out, I expect for him to pay. Oh, I make sure I am quietly prepared for some foolishness, but I don't expect to pay for that date.

This is another reason why I don't go on dates before at least having 2-3 telephone conversations. And hey, if you're unsure and/or want to go Dutch, Ask!!! Believe it or not, people tend to answer with the tone of their voice.

Like I said, I wasn't taught this. I was schooled to watch his eyes, teeth, & shoes. I also was taught to not act like an opportunist & to order the priciest stuff on the menu. But I had to figure who pays for a date on my own.

If I'm "wrong" and someone can find and discuss with me some factual evidence(not Googled societal norms on manners) on why I am, be my guest. I'm always ready to learn.

As Always Talking to You In Adult Terms!!!