Who Loves You, Baby? It Better be You!!!

Here's A Question

That's the Answer!

Saw that on Football Nerd's nephew, Vinny B's Facebook page, and I thought it is a lovely ice breaker for this post.

Until I stop hearing whining about not having Valentine's Day Date, I will still be preaching Self Love.

Until I stop seeing articles like How To: Spend Valentine's Day Alone or 7 Ways For All The Single Ladies To OWN Valentine's Day This Year, I'll stop posting about Self Love. Until very divisive memes like that one are not shared & like, I'm talking Self Love

I am tired of people wrapping all their self-worth into companionship, especially on a particular day. Last year, I was low-key mourning even though I had put myself back on the market the month earlier. I still made a post about self-love because to whine about who is not in my life is wrong.

The most mind-boggling part to me is that most people (single, in a dating relationship, & married) know to love themselves. I just don't know if they don't or don't know how to. The funny part is we love ourselves in small ways every day. I have 4 small signs that I always rely on to keep tabs on my fondness of myself.

• How is my physical & mental health? Am I trying to be as healthy as I can be? We know if we are not drinking enough water. We know if we are not getting enough rest. We if we are keeping up with our body's maintenance via health care provider appointments. I said health care provider because some of us need to check in with mental health specialists to talk some things out. I for one am a proponent for therapy. Yes, I am a Christian and I got the Lord. I also believe God gave some humans the knowledge to help us be mentally balanced. Mental health is still a part of your health. And again you know if you are or are not taking care of yourself.
  

• Speaking of mental health, what do you say about yourself, here is a meme to consider. We have enough negative outside forces to dodge that are trying to feed all kinds of stuff into us all the time. Why would we feed more crap into us? If you are trying to love yourself, tell yourself loving things. I Am Enough!!! I Am Proud of Myself!!! I Am Not Fine but It Is Ok,  I Will Be!!! Until I Value Me, I Can't Value My Time!!! I Am Kind, I Am Smart, I Am Important!!!
  
  
• Do you have theme music? Here is an experiment to do for a month. Watch how you dress with music you love for one week. The next week, get dressed without music. Then repeat the steps for two more weeks. If you don't look better to & feel better about yourself after getting ready with music, I'll tip my hat to you. I have two "Getting Dress" playlists, one sacred list & one secular list. There is some about hearing this lyric to Nothing to Lose,  that empowers me to take on this world and all its crud. "He Gave Me Nothing to Lose but All To Gain" It can all bounce off because God didn't give that nothingness. I don't have to take it in. Then the song above. I heard these lyrics years ago and want to raise my fist in pride. "She's A Girl That Can't Be Beat Born And Raised On Ghetto Streets She's A Devastating Beauty A Pretty Girl With Ebony Eyes". A song that describes me. Theme music doesn't have to be only played when you are getting dressed. It should be played when you feel the need to be liberated. It needs to be listened to push what you love into you. No one wants to love the negative. Well, I don't think they do. So, your theme music more than likely reflects what is positive to you. 

  

  Ol' Sloppy Drunk Chicken
  Came out of the oven falling forward

• Every so often does something simple that you love. For example when you are shopping for bath soap. Pick a fragrance that you love even if no one else in your home would like it. Get them all that same scent that they like. I love to make Oven Beer Can Chicken as soon as it gets cold. It's a "dangerous" meal but I really take pride in making it. Recently, every time I wanted to make it for dinner, something would get in the way. Somebody wanted a meal before I put it on the schedule. Thanksgiving is coming up, we are already having turkey. Mom & Alura, whose 19 are going to the store, and I don't have bail money (legit concern of mine). And my distractions could go on & on. Well Super Bowl Sunday, I made this dish. I usually let them have party food that day. Well, not this year. They like it too so, I won't get any complaints. But just something simple like that. If you love it, do it sometimes.

Those are the little reminders I use to make sure I'm loving myself. Things to let me know I am checking in to make I'm ok. Loving yourself is not selfish. It's just knowing yourself, well. I read somewhere there are 5 Love Languages.

• Gifts
• Quality time
• Words of affirmation
• Acts of service (devotion)
• Physical touch (intimacy)

No one can truly love you if you don't teach them. And well you can't teach something you don't fluently speak. Be Fluent in You!!!

Oh and if I don't get to tell you on the 14th, Happy Valentine's Day!!!

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms