Hgh School Crushes, Would You Date Them As Adults?

I swear I watch a lot of shows that make me happy I am older. Black & Sexy TV has a show, Hello Cupid Reboot that does this very thing. The premise of the show includes two best friends (Baron & Derick) from high school, an unrequited high school crush (Mo), a dating app (Hello Cupid) & a bet.

Oh & the backdrop is a few days, maybe weeks before a 10 year high school reunion. Yep, the shenanigans are hilarious.

But the part that best friends don't know that we, the Black & Sexy TV fans know is their high school crush as an adult has a high strung attitude when she gets mad. We've seen her go off on her last boyfriend on a previous show called Chef Julian Since midway episode one, I've been waiting on her to go off. Heck, I would and I think I am much more level headed than Mo.

But the show got me to thinking, would anyone really want to date their high school crushes as adults.

Look at those roller prints

Changing Faces Inspired

Most people change at least a little bit as they get older. One of the very reasons why, I probably wouldn't date anyone I had a crush on in high school, they aren't the same. They changed. We all did, I hope. I did. I don't wear foam rollers to bed every night. I did in high school. Thanks to Facebook telling me I might know people, I think most of my crushes are married. Only 2, that I know of are single.

I didn't know those people

And they aren't "my type", now. One is now Muslim. Yeah, that an easy no. I'm a Christian. And the other guy, I've seen at an event in the recent past. He was very unnecessarily dismissive. He wedged himself in a conversation and the only thing he said to me was to smugly justify his intrusion. He wasn't rude high school. Well, I didn't think he was.

That is another thing to realize about crushes, the perceived fantasy. How many of our high school crushes were based off of known non-physical personality facts? My guess is very little.

Yep, I believed the movies
LoL

The guy who is Muslim now, was so cute to me. A classmate of mine told him I liked him and he came and introduced himself to me during lunch. He so was nice & courteous to me when in each other's presence. But one day I sat and thought over an incident where his buds jokingly told him I was a few table near at lunch, he didn't stop them.

Actually, he kind of snickered at some of the jeers. Then later on he saw me and pleasantly spoke. I, like a dumb butt in lust greeted him back. He was just being cordial but for some naïve reason I heard a R&B love ballad. His reaction with buds became a lesson later in life. And trust me, unrequited crushes teach you lessons for a lifetime.

Matter of fact, finding out a few of my crushes thought I was "too much of a good girl", "ugh" or "my buddy, here" was a lifesaver. Back then phrases like those stung my feelings or confused me.

My Favorite School Picture

Now, I feel like a guy saying I'm "too much of a good girl" means he didn't want to do a lot of work to get in between my legs. And that's alright. That "diss" was protection from heartbreak, teen pregnancy, STDs, & a reputation I didn't need & want. And I thank God for giving me the mind not to show that guy how "wrong" he was, but one to move forward & later learn from those moments. Moments that help me handle life as an adult now. *sigh* Isn't it good wisdom is not wasted on the young.

Maybe two of the characters are still stuck in the fantasy of their high school crush. Oh but I will have my popcorn ready for when the adult truth hits. Oh high school crushes, may they forever stay the pure imagine of love & light, we thought we wanted.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

The DUFF and My Dislike for the Term

DUFF means Designated Ugly Fat Friend.

The ugliest pic of me I could find.
And I actually think I was cute for
the end of the school day 

I don't know if I have ever been anyone's DUFF. I might have and didn't know it. I don't care too. I know people who have been the DUFF and they felt like crap. I have been accused of having one. And that is not a good feeling at all.

 I can't wait for this movie to come out. I'm going to see it in theaters.
1. It has an eye candy lister in in it. Romany Malco is the principal. 2. Strangely the teen angst movies of the millenium actually helps me understand my high school days. I first saw it with "Mean Girls" (We All were Mean Girls to somebody) and I have feeling this movie will be an aid also.

When I thought my forehead was big

High School was just that High School for me. There were ups and downs and by the time the last semester rolled around, I couldn't wait to graduate because I knew College was going to be much better. I went to a small turned gigantic magnet school for high school. Trust me the same high school social issues happen at magnet schools. Magnet school students are the same as those at a regular comprehensive school. They just did better academically in middle school. I came away finding out two things about myself when I left high school.
1. Proving to Adults, that tried to box me in, that I am smart is Fun (I did a stint in Summer School because of Chemistry. Counselor wanted me to drop down to the Regular High plan and that was not acceptable. The next school year we got a new counselor. And I did well under her & stayed on the Advance plan.) 
2. I hate for anyone to think I am mean & malicious to anyone I consider my friends. (The reason for this blog)

The same crap that gets me praise for now got me looked at weirdly in high school. I was a Christian, Plus Size, Sarcastic, Nerdy, Black girl that liked to read all types of books especially one with black characters. My grades were high A's to average B's (except for Chemistry). No matter how smart a-word I could be or how frequent (very) cuss words left my mouth, I was thought to be a good girl with many of the guys (Learned that my Senior year, the hard way). I was the teacher's pet to teachers I thought were Stupid (That is a phenomena that started in the 4th grade).  My favorite teacher was the most dislike but most respected in the school. I dressed by my own rules. Any random day, I would wear dress clothes, just because I like dressing up. I owned an obscene amount of cotton/spandex blend short skirts.

Looks at those shorts

My shorts (culottes actually) were knee length and longer. And the few times I wore jeans (I'm gonna blog about it, I promise), they were elastic waist mom jeans. They only thing consistently current or trendy about my look was my hair. I had a standing salon appointment every two weeks. I did gossip a tad but I was Not the go to gossip person. Oh and I was extremely clumsy. I fell a lot. My knees cuss me out about it, daily.

That face screams "Snark"

I guess I was "Popular Enough". I got invited to some of the parties. The popular people knew me. One of the popular people was/still is my friend. I ran with a small group people that resembled most of the same personality quirks I had, except for grades or smartness. That aspect varied. I ran with people that were graduating early or with honors and I was also friends with people who did Not graduate. Also the people I hung out with varied in looks. Ok I believe that No One is Ugly, They Just Don't Look the Way You Want Them to Look. Well, I ran with someone most people at school didn't look like they wanted them to. One day one of my other friends, who is also still my friend, actually said that was why I was that person's friend. I didn't even know how to respond to such a horrible accusation. So, I confided in another friend and I found out that one thought that about me with not just the one friend but also the friend that I was confiding to them about. So, I quietly did a poll of the others and found out most of them thought that person didn't look like they wanted them to look. I also found out that a few more thought I only hung with that person to make sure I looked better. I also quietly polled my non-school friend and family and they thought that about that friend and other outside of school friends also. I hated to know people thought that of me. Well being a teenager, what did I do? I tried to make sure that person looked good. That was what the teen angst movies of my teen years suggest I did. That failed big time because that person was comfortable in the skin they were in. As they should've been.

Look at the roller prints in that hair
Still wear that dress around the house

We grew apart once I went to college. That person visited me once while I was at UT-Arlington and I knew then we were worlds apart. We haven't spoken since then. The two accusers, are actually the only friends from high school I even still speak to without the aid of social media. Trust me, God is going to have to break us up. We have hurdled a lot worse issues than this. We are not the same people we were in high school, at all.

But I was Not that person's friend just so I could look better. That is a gross thing to do. I think that DUFFness is actually a natural occurrence among friends. DUFFs are not just the "ugly friend". DUFFs can be the "not a book smart friend", "goofy friend", or maybe the "not the same gender" friend of a group of friends. It's just a natural occurrence that somebody is different in someway in the group. If my opinion is ever proven true, we all are/will be DUFFs at some point in our friendship life.

College Graduate Confessions: My Response to Those Who Didn't Go

Starting a new Blog Series. College Graduate Confessions. Had some down time and my mind got to going on thoughts about me being a college graduate. Enjoy

I am a College Graduate. Actually my degree is 10 years old this year (August), Yay! I stay on top of my professional study courses as much as I can, also. One day I’m going to get my Masters (No I'm not a person constantly say that either).  Life will not stand in the way forever. But it amazes me how many people I know that feel the need to say in my presence how they were tired of school when they graduated high school. I have been asked/told whether I like been in school numerous time in life.  Maybe it’s me but it is So Annoying. From the time I was graduating high school until this day there are these people that feel the need to say it. I feel like a jerk if I respond but this my blog and I can be a jerk if I want to.  So is what I want to say so badly.

I knew I wanted to go to college since I was 9 years old. I knew I belonged on a college campus when I was in high school hoping that college had to be better than this. I was 85% correct. Portions of college can be just a Dumb as high school. I chose college it didn’t choose me. I didn’t go because everyone else was going to college. I wanted to go. Yes, I like going to school. I like learning. You chose your path and I chose mine. Now let go live our lives.

Okay I got typed out. Trust me most people in the world know that every one is not College material. Most people know every one can not go to college. That's what make our world so beautiful and diverse.

It is just that some people don’t get that they sound as annoying to me as those people that brag that they have their BA from Lah-Lah, MBA from Blah-Blah and getting their PHD from the story goes on. (Yeah those that Brag about their degrees get on my nerves to). I don’t know if people are saying that they didn’t go to school because they feel inferior and want to justify why they didn’t go, want you to feel bad for going to school, or they are just aimlessly talking thinking they are fitting in. It is probably a strange combination of all three. I just want it to stop. Especially around people like me who don’t care what you do with your life as long as you are a decent citizen to this world. They are slime balls with and without degrees, everywhere. Just care about not being one of them.

I’m just tired of hearing it. We all need to live our own lives. We don’t owe anyone an explanation as long as it is right and good. So let’s get back to living our living as decently as we can make them.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms