After the Long Distanced post, a reader asked me
I'm not J. Mac or his sister, I promise. I am just a nosy fan!
If J. Mac moved back, would you date him again?
My Long Distanced did and I'm just wondering...
So this blog post is born.
Ex’s has teetered that grey area many times. But every time I try to either date again off the Good Ex list or be friendly with one of the Bad Ex list, God put barriers there to stop me. So I decided I am “Queen No Backsies”. So this post could easily be “Why I am Queen No Backsies”.
Okay, I'm going to try not to look gullible but as my mother says “We all have had some dark days in romance”. A Songwriter even said, “Everybody plays the fool sometimes”. There are two times that I tried to go back that stand out make me look very stupid.
Once a Bad Ex text me a couple of years after I broke things off asking could he and I be friends. Either sleepiness or forgiveness made me say yeah and me being friends with him last all from Thanksgiving time until Christmas time. A Chosen Family member, who didn't know he had contacted me at all called me and dropped some knowledge about his actions while we were dating that blew me away. Christmas day he text me Merry Christmas and I sent him a “Nicety” message that didn’t tell him Happy Holidays. Well, on New Year’s Day he wished a nice one and I had to go intellectually crazy and say “Nicks the friends crap and leave me alone”. I got told to “Go to Hell” and as far as he is concerned that is where I am. He tried to speak when I was on my way to a massage last year and I didn't speak because I am where… Right!!! That’s a small price to pay for peace of mind.
Have you ever had a guy say he wanted to try again with you and literally forget? I have. Yep, and the dude is on the Good Ex’s list. All I said was I will give it some thought. I never told him when but I gave myself, 6 weeks. And I really did think. I went to one of my male BFF’s for advice and everything. I prayed. A week before I was to give my decision (that actually was going to be a “Let’s wait a while”) he call to see if I was still going to this major celebration that he had invited me to. So, I told him after that event, I'll give him my decision. He had no clue what I was talking about. I gave him the rest of the week to search his memory and figure out what I was talking about. The night before the event he called and finally asked me what did he forget. I went off and I didn't go to the event either. Our friendship took that swat and eventually repaired itself (weeks of silence). I decided to totally forgive him. So, if it was a knee-jerk reaction initially or total memory loss (He had a bad memory too), I won't ask and he better not tell me.
So “Queen No Backsies”, I will stay. Lessons learned. After Mr. Bad Memory, I don’t even entertain possibilities when any Ex. Friendship or absence only. New Guys to date only.
Oh, the song I posted, yeah I'm being funny. Enjoy!!!
As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms
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