Because I Still Believe...

I would like to be in a dating relationship. I do want to get married. I joke about not getting married until I'm age 65 (He has a check & I have a check) as a joke. Yet, life might be taking me to task on that idea. I was having quick (under 5 minute) talk about Will I ever get married with my friend, Blog name, Jay-May and it hits me. I HATE whining about me being single. LoL But I am going to have to learn to stop discussing my desire to be in a relationship with a few people in my life. Those people fall under one or many of these 3 categories:

• People who think they have a kinship and go on an on about the woes of being single. (No "Being Single" conversation should last more than 15-20 minutes and I don't like having that conversation more than once a month.)
• People who want to tell me why I am single (and strange enough unhappy). Yeah, they are an assuming bunch of self-appointed advisors.
• People(mostly those who MUST be in a relationship to survive) who feel they need to play match maker (offline & online). I'm even going to stop joking with these folks because they do not get my brand of comedy at all.
  

It freaks me out and I never see those annoying behaviors creeping up. I'm always deep in before it dawns on me that I am having This conversation. Having the conversation too much places my mind in continual thoughts like:

• Am I actually too Lame to be dating. Am I too Serious to date?
• While going off the market and getting me together, did I missed Mr. Right?
• Was there ever a Mr. Right? Am I like Apostle Paul, Oprah and countless of others who feel like single(non-married) life is the life for me?
• What if I have some funky aura that causes potentials to be grossed out?

I don't like dealing with those kind of topics unless I am suppose to be doing the "Me" work and I must deal with these certain points head on to function in life. But just to dwell on them makes me feel desperate. I Hate feeling desperate. That's how I spent to much time dating losers just because they liked me.

I mean those losers were life lessons but, I don't need to be in that headspace all the time. That headspace is the venue for dating pity parties. I got other stuff to do other than to attend that life sucking event.

Because I still have the faith in romantic love, doesn't mean I need to be down on myself because I not experiencing it now. No one should be down on themselves. And I am refusing to be pull into the talk anymore.  Oh well, back to my self-love inner lair. I'll stay there until I am to share this love with another.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms