First it was RoomieLoverFriends now The Unwritten Rules has ended. I've known for a week or two.
It still makes me sad. I really like that web series.
It is about Racey Jones and her journey in being the only black woman in her department at work. It is a hilarious view on an issue many black people face everyday. Each episode ends with a rules or lesson to be learned.
It is based on a great book (Yes, I read it) called "40 Hours and an Unwritten Rule: The Diary of a N***er, Negro, Colored, Black, African-American Woman" by Kim Williams. Aasha Davis stars a Racey. Racey's superior is Kathy. Kathy is racist. Not KKK racist but the kind that knows how to play the affirmative action ball as long as blacks are in their place.
Well, of course the blacks (Especially the new CEO, Kaneisha Jackson) don't stay in their place and Kathy can't take it.
Also to add to the white worry of Racey is Jessica & Lauren. The mean well but with their unawareness to their white privilege keeps Racey questioning their motives and friendship.
Oh white people are not the only headache causing people on the show for Racey. Craig & Derek, who understand the plight of Racey have different agendas they want met at work. Both take different paths in executing them. Both affect Racey. Racey's only allies in the show are her co-worker, Peter, Kaneisha's assistant, Annabelle and her boyfriend, Will.
Yeah, I watched the Series Finale during the lunch hour.
Racey was at a crossroads. Should she stay or should she go? I'm not going spoiled the ending but I will focus on one the scenes in the beginning of the episode. Racey asks Kaneisha how did she not lose her mind while being the only black woman to eventually becoming the CEO. Kaneisha told her how she did it in very creative way to me.
"It is all just a game. And you just have to grab the ball and force everyone to play with you"
That was powerful advice, in my opinion. And "the game" becomes a good point of thought for Racey in this episode. I'll give you a spoiler hint, "The field will change and Racey will make a decision, then". I loved the ending. It stopped on the right point and the last rule was perfect.
Gosh, I can Relate. For me it started...
I told y'all I lived an all black life until I got to middle school. Yet, it was not until I got into Lamar University's Nutrition & Dietetics classes did I experience life as the only black. It started Summer I. I am a career Code Switcher whose experience with race (Blacks were a different, too) at this school was already eye opening. But even that didn't prepare me for this experience. First, it was the name game. My biological name always gets butchered. I was used to it. I was prepared for it. I was not prepared for the relief I saw when I corrected the saying of my name. It was like they were prepared for me to have an attitude. Then the questions about how I got the name and the practicing to say it right. Yes, they broke it down into syllables. Secondly, some how became the expert for the eating habits and self image of black people. "So, do you think Black people feel that BMI & body shape charts are for White people only"? I'll never forget that day to save my life.
There I was a full hourglass, maybe an apple shaped black woman sitting among quite a few rectangles and inverted triangles wondering when my name became "All Black People". Third, when Fall began and all those black students I saw come in and out the building before that Summer I session returned. The first day of Fall classes I heard a few black students murmur in confusion about who I was and why did all the white people know me. I saw the writing on the wall quickly. Well, the instructor wanted us to pair off and that we would be partners for the semester. I ended up being partners with the newest new student to the department, a hispanic woman around my age. She was one of the best partner ever. Fourth was when I decided to help drum up some business for my buddy Dee and got my hair cornrowed. My classmate, Becky was so enamored with my hair. "These are extensions, right"? She was so disappointed when I took them down and put my hair back into a bun. Finally, Summer I of the next school year rolled around. I walked in and I saw this lone black lady's eyes light up when I walked in. She was new & was happy to see my black face. She clinged to me for few classes until she found her stride.
If you watched the show, some of these life experiences would remind you of the episodes,
Let's Talk About Hair
The Whack Girl (Which actually describe my feeling at LU as a whole)
Just A Group Of Us (When Craig gets there)
Guess Who's Coming to the Fundraiser.
My Favorite Episode:
The Merry Christmas episode is so funny. It starts when Racey is chosen to decorate her team's cubicle. Who does she bring?
She brings Leroy, the Black Santa!!! It gets the conversation about the ethnicities of Santa and Jesus.
Then at the holiday party, the company finds out the old CEO is being brought up on charges and in comes the New CEO, Kaneisha Jackson. Racey & Craig have party at the party. The company was being ran by a black woman, Oh Happy Day!!! The Merry Christmas is the beginning of the harder conversation underlying within the show. What is "race'" in post-Obama USA? After Jackson gets there, the show looks a lot like the current political climate in this country. The Republicans (Kathy) got violently upset at the changes. The "Black Voters" (Craig & Derek) that were first on board may or may not stay on board because of the changes don't exactly fit their agenda. And All the citizens who just want a better, fairly ran country (Racey & Peter) but see their voices being quieted by the others.
Fascinating work, I say!!! I'm going to miss this show. I love the theme song also (that is not it in the clip). It's called Ox Tails by French Telefone. Pick it up on ITunes & Amazon. Oh when you watch Unwritten Rules,
Check out another series on Ink Spot Entertainment channel called Everything I Did Wrong in My 20's. It is very life affirming. I have yet not to finish an episode in awe or in tears. Also as I said in my tweet you saw, there will be other thought provoking shows in 2015 to "Start A Conversation".
Don't know what I will watch on the first Wednesday of the month now but I am glad I spent past ones with The Unwritten Rules. One day hope these rules are broken. One Day... and Even on that day, Racey Rules!!!
For the past few nights I have been thinking about this topic. I decided to share it with you guys, my Blogger audience. It will be quick
At the Big Box store near my sister's home there is this male worker I've seen a couple times (actually just saw him this past weekend) that always speaks. He says the same thing when he sees me.
Him: "Hey. How are you doing"?
Me: "Hi. I'm fine and yourself"?
Him: "Great, now that I see you".
I always smile & chuckle in response. No matter how I may look in the store that is what he says.
Tired Eyes + Headache = The Specs
No matter how focused I am (because grocery shopping is not on my faves list) that is what he says. I don't know his name and what he says may very well be his standard line. (I'll await comments and/or questions from the FBFs that have seen me there (and other nosy FBF) on FB.) But let's play the "What If" game.
The word Presence comes to mind. Presence means the state or fact of existing, occurring, or being present in a place or thing.
What if every time I walked into that store and my presence really did brighten that man's day? What if everywhere I went, I brightened someone's day? It makes me think about what does our presences say when we are anywhere, especially in places where most people don't know us. Just the fact of being somewhere like a store, park, bank, etc, not even saying a word and just moving about doing whatever activity that is done, can speak to someone.
That is powerful.
I would hate to know that my sheer being somewhere turned a virtual stranger off. That would tell me that my aura stunk with negativity. I consider myself a mostly positive person. This is Pic Collage is I have envision what I look like on the inside.
I don't want strangers to feel they would get Ms. Tired Sweat Pants all the time by being around a few moments simple energy I giving to the atmosphere. Especially if I thought I was giving out positive energy.
So, let's work on what Presence is saying. Let's work making "just being around" us more positive. Never know how "Great, Now That I See You" feeling you could give someone without ever saying a word.
I know this cold weather has me hibernating at night but I know didn't miss Thanksgiving. Did I miss the memo about skipping Thanksgiving? I hope not because that means I won't get to curl up in bed that night after everyone has left with my mother's green bean casserole (She omits milk & soy sauce & add cheese soup) and watch the best Thanksgiving movie ever, Pieces of April.
I really don't want to miss doing that.
Oh I didn't miss Thanksgiving!!! There was No memo stating to skip Thanksgiving!!!
Then Can We Act Like It???
For the past few years I think the Christmas sights are starting earlier and earlier. We barely get finished passing out Halloween/Harvest?Hallelujah Night candy. I know what it is. We are excited to celebrate the birth of the man sent from God, who came to die for our iniquities, rise in three days with All power in his hands and ascend to Heaven to make preparations so, he can come back for us.
Oh I get it. But can we acknowledge the day we made to set aside to be thankful for not just for Jesus' birth but for Everything, God the Father blesses us with.
I know that is not the initial reason why American Thanksgiving (I'm thankful for that also) was made but we Americans can't even keep our own traditions. We spit on the our own observances to go shopping in the middle of the day to buy more stuff . I wonder how many Christmas gifts are actually bought during these early "Black Friday" sale days. I just heard a consumer advisor say the cheapest an oven will be 3:oo pm Thanksgiving day. Who will be giving a oven this year? I would love to meet the giver because that is a great gift. And who is truly benefiting? Not the worker who can't enjoy the day of gratefulness because they are at work. They have to corral you crazed sale wanting shoppers. Not your pocket books because that's why you want the sales, you afford that stuff at regular prices. Maybe the economy but that is just a short while because when are we buying like this the rest of the year.
Again I said I get it. Oh it is a sale before the hustle and bustle. I've been known to buy something for a Christmas gift for someone in September because it won't be there when I come back. What I don't understand the spirit of ungratefulness the early shopping is done in. Pushing and shoving for a deal, opening stores before 12 am the day after Thanksgiving, advertising Christmas commercials early promotes that spirit. Everyday is a Day of Thanksgiving but when I see Hershey showing my favorite Christmas commercial
(Next month I'll discuss that) before most of us have bought all the Sweet Potato pie ingredients (still need to get potatoes),
it makes you question are we being sheepily lead into believing that Thanksgiving day should be canceled. I hope not. I would hate to see in the future we become a country that Never sits down as a whole show God all the gratitude he is owed, Consumerism & Commercialism are trying to take advantage by using our excitement to celebrate Jesus' birth. Don't let those greed factions beaugard the Thanksgiving spirit away by pushing up the sights of Christmas up earlier.
Okay I'm jumping off my soap box. What are doing for Thanksgiving?What are you cooking? Anybody celebrating the day with a Friendsgiving? Let me know in the comments.
And if I don't talk to you on that day, Happy Thanksgiving!!! Not an Early Thanksgiving because Everyday is a Day of Thanksgiving. Whoo, I could shout off that fact right there. I know I'm so churchy but you love me because I am.
I am quite aware many of
you will read this (and have read other posts in this series) like "Man, she be
critical like a mug. I see how she is. Ol' bougie, stuck up BAP. Irregardless
of what she say, Imma be me." And that is exactly my point. LoL
Somewhere it is becoming socially acceptable to talk like all the years of sitting in English class learning grammar is a waste. So, blame this blog post on the teacher & Chick Fil A manager banning slang in the classroom & workplace. In which I stand and clap with hearty agreement. I just don't understand why people think talking in slang all the time is cute. Can you imagine if you were ordering a Chicken Biscuit one morning and the person taking your order said, "You want a chicken biscuit or nah. Fam, those be on fleek". I just rolled my eyes at that after I typed it. I wish I would hear some foolishness.
Many of
us speak slang, sometimes. I know I do.
It is one of the reasons I am nervous
about doing a vlog. I would get too relaxed and sound like some home girl. And
I only sound like that to survive walking down the street or I'm very angry. It
actually grates my nerves to talk to someone who only or mostly holds their
conversation in slang. Especially if the person is claiming to have some smarts
about themselves, it's mind numbing. Sometimes, if one could hear my niece,
Alura and I engage in conversation, one would laugh. The scene would contain a
lady acting like a grammar teacher and an older teen frustrated with that lady.
It is something about talking in slang all the time that sound unintelligent. I
hate for people to have a perception that I am dumb. I feel like with me being
Black, Plus Size, Southern, and living in the Inner City I can't afford to make
that stupid perception be true. And of course that is what I am teaching my
niece & nephew. Many times what comes out of your mouth tells a story about
you. Whether if it is the true story or not.
Unfortunately, many men
on the dating scene were not taught that. Many men don't get that they can
talk themselves out of not getting the number or dates with what comes out their mouths. What is wrong with
"Hello" or "Hey, How are you doing?”? No, folks want to cool and
hip and approach their person of interest with "Say ma, how you be or 'Sup”.
Oh and does stop there. Some slip by with a nice Hi and later their
conversation gets very sloppy. I went out with a guy once and his approach was
cool. Our few phone calls were great. We went out on a date and I thought I had
been punked. I had never heard so many uh's and say's while anyone ordered in my
life. I thought he might have been nervous until at the end the night and he
said "Check this out Guh, I ain't had a good time like this in a long
time. That food was gooder than a mug". I was expecting "Check it
out, I had a good time. The food was good". Clearly, there was not another
date. What is wrong with talking like that? Why does talking lazy have to be
the cool thing to do?
Oh I know some of you
are sitting there thinking "Well, she needs an educated dude".
No,
that is not what I am saying. I have dated men who were former street corner
drug dealer that have been to prison with barely a high school diploma that
didn't talk lazy all the time. I have also been on college campuses with guys
who spoke as if slang was their native tongue. Education has nothing to do with
it. Age has nothing to do with how a man talks. I'm not dating anyone under
that age of 35 these days. Also rarely, am I even approached by anyone under the age
of 30. These are adultmen that talk like this, I dislike talking
to people who act like it is a bother to talk like one has some sense most
days.
I am not saying when a
guy is on the basketball court not to speak slang. But who plays basketball all
day. I just don't like guys whose conversations are more than 35% of slang. I
like men who act like some of the grammar lessons taught to them got through
and not be ashamed to speak like it. That's all!!!
Okay let me go edit this
bad boy. Make sure this post is on fleek. I can't be talkin' all about how the
bruhs be talkin and have all deez errors. I be not that type of Guh. LoL
OAN: If Spell & Grammar check was a person it would more than likely cussed me out for making it work so hard on the post. ☺☺☺
I should Not be saying Spoiler Alert because you should be watching THIS SHOW!!!
Umm, who is not aware that I am Addicted to Web Shows? How did that happen? Right now I have to be the fan of something like 70 web shows. I told y'all in this BLOGunlike the reality shows that everyone else watches, "I relate to Web Shows better".
Well my favorite, RoomieLoverFriends after three seasons ended on Halloween. I was hurt at first. Not my baby! Not Tamiko! Not Jay! So I voiced my concerns on Twitter & YouTube leading up to the series finale.
It didn't matter I was still watching it. I am a FAN until the end and even after.
So at 1 something in the morning, after a Halloween party, I watched the Series Finale, which happened to be a Halloween (and birthday) party, also. And it didn't disappoint.
I'm sad but better things are coming. In the Summer of 2015, RoomieLoverFriend will be a movie in theaters. I can Not wait!!! I really hope it comes to Dallas. I know it's not LA, New York, or Atlanta but Dallas is a large metropolitan city, too.
RoomieLoverFriends is about roommates, Tamiko & Jayson (Jay) and what happens when they sleep with each other.
Jayson is a charming & outgoing personal trainer, who reaction to what he doesn't like is very monkey see, monkey do. Tamiko is a very observant & lay it on the line business owner. Also, she's petty and has an attitude that goes from 0 to 100 at a moments notice. Also these two bring into their world,
Well Meaning & Laughable Friends & Family
A Dinner & Clothes & Accessories Thieving Ex & other Potential Suitors
Trifling, Nosey, & Messy Neighbors
And a Creepy, Overprotective Daddy, who is also a Sugar Pops
Since September 2012 I have been hooked on the hijinks & drama of these two that I lovingly call Jamiko, Oh and that video above is the theme song, Enjoy!!!
What Made them my Favorite?
-I saw part of me. I am a Tamiko. I am very observant and I have a great memory.
Too many shifty people in your life make you that way. But the downfall is that you come off rather petty when you bring some of your observances up. Then that person gets upset or lies and boom the raging attitude explodes. For example Tamiko had a 72 hr that changes to 24 hr rule about overnight guests. $75 dollars for any day stay after they scheduled stay. Well, she had to execute that twice in the show. Once because of the very reason for the rule. Her roommate had snuck in a squatter. Some folks said she was trivial about that. Umm, when the bills goes up would it be fair for Tamiko to pay the increase? I didn't think so. I'm not excusing Tamiko on some of her actions. But, I will say I understood them a lot. I understand how someone could act like that. Also, Tamiko, like many women had a hard time in surrendering herr heart. I told you she was observant. Jay always wanted to be with her but it looked like he only wanted to show his interest in the apartment. That was because of the nature of how their romantic rapport started and the fact she didn't require him to show his interest in her outside the apartment until later. I think she like many of us women had to learn that.
Until she found herself worthy of just being more than his RoomieLoverFriend did she see how her really saw her.
-This is an aspect of relationships, I Never experienced. I had the opportunity, once when I was graduating college. The guy didn't want me to leave college town and wanted me to stay with him. It didn't make sense to me. We weren't dating or even screw buddies for that matter. I guess he just really wanted for me to be close by. I didn't have job or even a job prospects. Also I could not figure out how to explain to my mom why I would be staying. So I returned home and he pouted about me not staying. I am so thankful for turning that offer down for more reasons other than this show. The guy ended up getting a job in another city and state. I would've ended up at home anyway. One of the writers confirmed that some of the storyline was loosely based off events in her life. It was refreshing to see that stories like this do exist without being farfetch. This is a believable story. Pop culture want us to believe that we all can sleep with one another and not ever catch feelings. Sorry mainstream media!!! Many times, we are catching feelings.
-The Eye Candy on the show. Andra Fuller who plays Jay is so fine. Yeah, his quick to jump to conclusions without all the facts approach got on my nerves but he still looked good. I see how Tamiko hook up with him.
He's Team Eye Candy &Pinterest Board. I don't care if he played a gay guy on LA Complex. I didn't watch that teeny bopper show. He plays a gorgeous straight man on RoomieLoverFriends. And I have a feeling he's the type if he were gay, it would be known. If he is, oh well, the lust was fun while it lasted. Even with that struggle beard, Jay look good.
And let us not forget Austen Jaye as Austin & Sinorice Moss, a former football player as Jessiah.
For a petty chick, Tamiko sure did have some fine, Fine, FINE men in her romantic life. Oh and who remembers when Jay & Austin were about to fight because Austin called Tamiko a 'ho'.
All that fineness was about to punch each other out. But it didn't come to that. Black & Sexy TV,if you are reading this, can I play Jay's cousin from Texas in the movie? I mean, he needs some relatives on camera. I know Jay is from Louisiana but he could have went to college in Texas. I promise not to be incestuous on camera. I promise!!!
Weel I still have next Summer of 2015, Roomie Lover Friends. I know I have other shows to watch. Black & Sexy TV with That Guy & Hello Cupid at least will keep me company. But nothing will be Jamiko on RoomieLoverFriends. I'm hoping for a Black & Sexy TV wedding.
As long as Mike from That Guy will not perform at the reception as Prince like he did on the Finale.
He was a hilarious mess. Oh and I hope they answer my question finally "Where is Joshua"? I think he's Jessiah. Jessiah is Joshua's middle name and he might be a tad vengeful. Sheldon the Sugar Pops, Tamiko & Calista better watch out. LoL
Oh, I just found the After Party recap has posted. I on my way to watch that. Oh I didn't tell you one of my post made it onto a After party episode!!! Watch it HERE!!! (Yes, I tweeted them back. My comment was edited for grammatical purposes. Y'all know I get excited when I type. LoL)
It's cuffing season. How do I know? My singleness is bothering the desperate to in relationship, the kinda really want to be in a relationship, & all the matchmakers in my life. I shouldn't say bother. May I say, they really want me to be in a relationship. Some feel like Everybody should be in a relationship. Some feel like they're tired of being single so, somehow I should be too. But yeah, I have like more than a handful of people right now wanting to set me up on dates. I even had a friend to offer to write an online dating profile for me. I know their hearts are in the right place but their thought processes are very wonky.
Matchmaking & blind dating is a grey area. I've been there, got the T-shirt, and could pen a few novel loosely based on my experiences. Let me tell you guys something that I've never actually said. Though I have participated and still won't totally reject participating in dating based on the matchmaking process, I am Very weirded out by it.
When people want to "hook me up" with a guy, I never understand their motives. Especially, when the guy & I have never seen or met one another. I understand if he saw me and thought I was cute or vice versa. I understand if I mention more than 3x's a months that I really want to date. 3xs a month is a sign of wanting be in a relationship, in my opinion. Even when I in my moment of wanting to go on a date, I know I don't mention that more than 3xs a month. Matchmaking people just because what one thinks could be good for them, in weird to me. Again I know their hearts are in the right place. But it is hard to not wonder why do people feel like you can't find like, lust or love if you wanted to on your own. It's hard not to think that people think you don't know how to pick a possible companion for yourself. It's hard to ask them why do they think I need to be booed up. It's hard for me not to think people actually think I am so dogface, fat, mean, Christianity-based, educated, whatever that I will never date again without their help. It is very hard for me not to ask them, Why are you trying to hook me up.
I'm not saying I've never hooked anyone up.
But I've only played matchmaker when someone was interesting in someone else I knew or was really wanted to be in a relationship. I'm pretty oblivious to other people's romantic loneliness. That's something people have to say for me to pay attention to. Just this time last year, I found a good guy for a buddy of mine (who was really wanting to be in a relationship). They both were professionals, well read, liked traveling and had seen to have similar interest in religion, music, & comic books. I even found out they ran in the same circles and may have know one another. I told my buddy about the guy, my buddy looked the person up and was not interested. I backed off. and I don't revisit the idea.
I guess that might be my problem. I really want to many of these matchmakers in my life to back off. Most of them have failed already and don't even realize it.
I have a mental list of those who are Not allowed to hook me up on a blind date Some won't get a chance again. Some will never get a chance because of their thought of the types of guys they think I would like (based on their limited knowledge of guys I've dated (Only 1 of my friends knows all the guys I've dated in my Adult life). Some will not get a chance just for sheer annoyance of always wanting me to date. I've even decided to Never tell some of these people when I decide to get back on the market or that I am ever romantically lonely. Yeah, it's that bad.
So, blind dates are not high on the list of my dating pool of guys. Now, if you know dude is trying to holla, that's different. Pass the info and move on. I got it from there.
Matchmakers, don't come for me until I call for you. I love you! I truly do. But until then, stop trying to make me a match.
Well it's Halloween time! As I was rolling my eyes looking at this years starter crop of distasteful Halloween costumes (ebola costumes, child as Ray Rice, some chick as a used sanitary napkin) Monday morning, many distasteful Walmart articles kept popping up.
Market Report: Walmart Features Horrifying Selection of “Fat Girl” Costumes
Seemly it was up for a few days before Monday. Twitter was abuzz about it even days after.
So, I decided to look myself. Because surely not Walmart being gross in labeling the Plus Size. Then I saw it with my own eyes.*sigh*. Walmart had to get their first "Plus Size Hate" strike. I had to join Twitter and tweet along. 45 minutes later after I saw the section, it disappeared from the website.
Walmart apologizes for 'fat girl' costumes
Here is an article about the apology HERE. It is disgraceful that it was on the website. Like I said before in a previous BLOG, the plus size can take there money somewhere else. If Walmart keeps this up, it will be on my boycott list that already includes its competitor, Target and Old Navy, As much money I give Walmart... Get it together Walmart!!!
I'm going to say because it is Halloween, somebody in the web developing department or some hackers thought it would be a laughable Trick or Treat joke. I mean, It's Halloween in America where blackface and deadly diseases an acceptable costume. So making fun of fatties is okay. Be it Halloween or not, fat people are fair game to joke about anyway. Oh it's wrong to make fun of anyone because of their age, race, creed, gender, national origin, religion, sexual orientation, gender identity, disability, marital status or socioeconomic status. Someone's body type or weight is a free for all for humor and taunts, always. Not funny, jerkwad!!! I hope all involved who thought it was okay for it to be on the website lose their jobs.
Even with that gross mishap, it is still Halloween time. I've been invited to a Halloween theme revue & a Halloween party by sister's friend whose birthday is that day. For safety sake I'm not going to the Halloween revue. Some revuer grab me from behind and scare me and get punched in the costume shorts. Plus all the Tootsie Roll & Sucker references will get old real quick. I do wonder, If Revuers wear costumes on Regular revue nights, Do they wear their regular clothes on stage for Halloween? LoL But I might go to the party.
I plan on being a cowgirl with lollipop stained lips.
You know, I look like I've been eating candy all night. LoL If not I'll pass out candy to the few trick or treaters we have until 8pm and then I'll watch the 1986 classic, "The Worst Witch" (the clip above) and anything else Halloween (fun, non-scary) related.
Are any of my readers celebrating Halloween (or All Saints Eve, Neewollah, Hallelujah Night, Harvest Night)? How are you doing so? Let me know in the comments.
Well if I don't talk to you on October 31st, Happy Halloween!!!
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First it was RoomieLoverFriends now The Unwritten Rules has ended. I've known for a week or two.
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