Light Girls (Am I Watching This?)

 Reading Night, Monday will be canceled this upcoming week. I am watching the Light Girls Documentary. Not just because I am light-skinned. I am also watching because all aspects of Colorism (a form of prejudice or discrimination in which human beings are treated differently based on the social meanings attached to skin color) or Massa still ruling us need to be talked about. I watched Dark Girls and that was powerful. I feel like Light Girls will be just as profound for me. 

What is Light Girls?

Distinguished filmmaker Bill Duke produced the documentary film, DARK GIRLS, which premiered on The Oprah Winfrey Network last year and the show sparked a much-needed international conversation on colorism, self-esteem, and healing. The movement continues with the sequel, LIGHT GIRLS.

LIGHT GIRLS is an in-depth study of the advantages and disadvantages of being a light-skinned woman. Does light skin make for an easier life? LIGHT GIRLS explores skin color from historical, sociological, psychological, and scientific perspectives. This documentary is a global analysis of skin color addressing the following contemporary issues: bullying, skin bleaching, and this popular #teamlightskin versus #teamdarkskin rivalry on social media.

This is not just a conversation, but a movement that requires action, accountability, and responsibility. LIGHT GIRLS emphasizes the importance of healing and taking action. Please, don't just join the discussion, but join the movement!

I am hoping this documentary educates the origins & dispels stereotypes about those of us of lighter hues. Like "Light Skin Privilege", I am not saying it doesn't exist. I will say it is not as widespread & automatic as people think. 

Have you ever heard of "Not Black Enough"? Go to all the makeup counters (drugstore to high-end) and guess who has to mix and match foundations to get their color right in some brands. Also, the most popular Light Skin black people are stuck up and mean to Dark Skin black people. So, there are no pompous Dark Skinned black folks. Ha!

My life is full of colorism. The funny part is as prominent as it was, I was slow to the conversation. In my home light skin & dark skin were never said around me until I was 8. I first heard that term on the playground when I was called light-skin (and thought I was better than). One reason is my family. Like most black families, our skin tones are vast. I call my family a Black American Rainbow.

These are my cousins on my grandmother's side of the family. We call ourselves the 4th generation (there are in-laws, one 5th generation person & family friends on here). All our grandmothers & grandfathers are siblings. That is just one set of my relatives and not even all of them. So, it floored me when one of my relatives started dating a guy who had a skin tone that one of my older relatives disapproved of and voiced their horrible feelings. The blinders were off and could not be put back on. I decided that day to be on "wish creed" with that person & their opinion on who I decided to date's skin tone. Also, I was bullied because of my skin tone. I told y'all in another BLOG about my experiences with this person. This person is dark-skinned and had issues with my light skin. I didn't recognize their problem (Heck, I was also fat, nerdy, and had a big bust) until my niece was born when I was an older teenager. Everyone was doting on her and that person said "But she's bright". The lightbulb came on and I got it. Hey, Hurt people hurt people. Even now people still say horrible things about me being light skin. I only have one light-skinned friend. Why do I know this? People that are not my friends have pointed this out. Oh, and I have been accused of hanging with mostly dark skin people to be the cute one in the group. Yes, I have gone off and cussed those people out. That lie will not be in the atmosphere. Out of my eleven best & close friends, only one is light-skinned. So the heck what? I hang out with all kinds of people. That is known and seen

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 But these are the only images some folks think I only live. I hang out with people whose personalities & lives mesh with mine well. Of course, the people who have pointed out that I only have one light-skinned friend don't have personalities that harmonize with mine. Never will I ever perpetuate the myth light skinned people don't get along with one another.

I just hope these documentaries help heal our society. By our society I mean not just African American or American but Human Beings.

Hope you watch it also. I will Live Tweet during the documentary-like I did DarkGirls. So if you want to join the discussion, I'll be there. Oh the song, is one of my favorites. No matter the skin tone, she ain't giving up no booty. LoL

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms.

The Hair Debate

I told you all that there three social debates I honestly think are stupid. Skin tones in the black
race has already been discussed. One day I'll discuss Working/Stay-at-Home moms but today let me discuss Relaxed/Natural hair.

I wear a relaxer. I've had a relaxer since I was 5. I don't want to wear my hair any other way. That's my choice. My sister wears her hair in natural locks. She can't imagine wearing a relaxer ever again. That's her choice.
Who made the Good Hair choice?
If you said My sister of if you said me, you are wrong, in my opinion. We both made Good Hair choices.

I HATE the term Good Hair. If you have hair on your head that is not falling out of your head, it is Good Hair.
The hair debate makes me outraged. Straight hair is not better than Wavy hair. Wavy hair is not more comb-able than Natural Coiled hair. Natural Coiled hair is not healthier than Straight hair. We need to get that through our skulls to our brain. The fact must get lost in the hair.

Hair choice is a matter of opinion. Opinions are not right or wrong. So how someone wears their hair is not right or wrong.

Boy massa did a number on us again. Lincoln may have emancipated us but our brains are still enslaved when it comes to hair choices. Well I'm off the plantation. My relaxed bob is cute just like my sister's locks. Afros are cute. Bald heads are cute. Weaves & ringlets are cute just like close cut haircuts. I think all hair is Good Hair. That's Great!

Always Talking to You in Adult Terms

Okay The Skin Tone Blog

If you want to know some of the most over argued topics I've ever heard, Skin Color within the Black Race is somewhere on my top 20 (natural/relaxed hair & working/stay-at-home moms are tied for #1) list. Boy, Massa did a number on us on the Ol' Plantation. It is 2012 and it is still can be a heated topic. It is unnerving for news or talk shows to have this topic on their schedule. But like a bad train wreck I watch them anyway. Maybe it the “Kum Bah Yah” in me to see if there is a different outcome

I'm not one who is color struck. I kind of wince at people teasing others about their skin tone. I don't believe "Two "light skins" can't be friends". I don't have mostly "dark skinned" friends so I'll be the cute "light skinned" friend. The first time I heard I was "light-skinned" was kindergarten on the black top and a "dark skinned" girl was rubbing my arm saying "Ooh you so light". I snatched my arm back. I thought it was weird that she was rubbing on me. Umm, can we say creepy? When I did, I hurt feeling and she then said "She think she's better than caused she light". I had no clue what she was talking about. As I got older I wondered where did she get that from. One day it clicked, like racism, it was taught to her at an early age. I feel sorry for people who grew up with Skin Tone issues.
I didn't always grow up in a family that talked about skin tones like that. It's was latere I've learned which older relatives have/had skin color issues. I don't know why because if you stretch just my mother's side of my family without in-laws and we look like a Gorgeous African-American Rainbow.

I try not to even jokingly tease people about their skin color. An ex-boyfriend turned best friend (who happens to be "dark skinned") learned the hard way. He called me a "house n-word" as a joke. I didn't take it as a joke and called him a "field n-word" as mean as I could. He learned then how I felt about those kinds of insults. I Don't like anyone being teased about their skin tone. It's Gross!!!

And before you say OutSpoken you're "light skinned" you don't understand how hard it is to "Dark Skinned" This is all easy for you to say. Well hurt "dark-skinned" people how many people “lighter” than you have you took your hurt feelings out on. Yeah, you guys have hurt other people in the name of skin tone also. I know because I was tease because others teased somebody else "dark skinned". Not going to call names. Not even tell y'all how I know this particular lady (girl back then) because she's kind of a popular person in some circles in my area of the country. But because she had to hear she was "Cute for a Dark Girl" or "That Black girl can... (almost slipped) she made it a point to refer to the color of my stockings (cafe au lait or nude) or me turning red or getting darker on the sun any chance she got. And other things that I will not talk about. Kinda screwed up and still hurtful to harp on. I never teased her about her skin color back (I didn't know how) (trust me I got her back one day and I went out with a BANG and she never bullied me again ). When my niece was born people was standing around raving and she said "But she so bright". By then I knew HURT PEOPLE, HURT PEOPLE. That's her cross to bear. Again I feel sorry for people who grew up with Skin Tone issues. But the "dark skinned" don't have the monopoly of being teased because skin tones. It's just more visible.

It's an issue I wish would die. There can't be a funeral quick enough for it. Trust me I will not mourn for it either. I'll wear my Fuchsia Suit with the gold buttons and my Gold Pumps and Holy Ghost dance on that day because I will be to glad to put it to rest. Might as well be fierce on that Happy Day.

P.S. Yes I used” ____-Skinned” to make a point.

Dating with Skin Tone Issues

The other night my close friend T.T. posted a fun question on Facebook, "What do you prefer your mate to be? Sweet suckable chocolate, smooth tasty caramel or creamy luscious vanilla? Taking about skin tone". My answer is/was "As long I can see the brown in their skin. No Extremes (light or dark) for me. Just my preference. My favorite Nice Creamy Peanut Butter. 8D I'm going to date one (of my favorite) One Day. Just One! That all! Won't know where I start and where he ends. 8D Then I'll marry the Mr. Chocolate that I attract. 8D ". The topic jarred this blog.

YES I have a dating preference and a favorite within my preference. Most of us who are honest do. Nothing wrong with that. What I think is Wrong for me to date, A Man with Skin Tone Issues. Oh I'm not talking about fair skin guys who Hate dating dark skin ladies or Dark skin men that think Fair skin women are ugly. Trust Me, I Don't Like that either and a BLOG about that is next. I'm talking about "Same Skin Tone" Hatred. For example a dark skin man that Hates dark skin women. Another example a fair skin guy dating a dark skin lady because she's a "Real Sister". Preference is one thing. Hatred and being Hurtful is another.

Why I won't date a man that thinks that way? 1) He has some hurting issues from the past that need to be healed. (Probably was teased earlier in life) And I don't date severe fragments of men. That issue is on the list. I will pray for you while you work through it but I will not date you. 2) I am not a JIF (the best peanut butter, in my opinion) colored trophy. Just like Some Black men who only date outside their race think they have some won a prize. Men who date their "winning" skin color feel they have Arrived, also. Just because Mr. Peanut Butter is my favorite to look at but I'm not hurtful to all the other flavors. Mr. Hershey Dark and Mr. White Chocolate can be just as tasty. For me to be nasty towards them, just makes the whole flavor profile distasteful. In non-food terms, It makes the race look bad. Just another example of lack of unity within us, African Americans. Check out the next BLOG.

Mr. Peanut Butter, if you are out there, I Will Not Date you or your pal Chocolate, best friend Vanilla, or cousin Caramel have if you Hatred within you. I will say this again, Preference is one thing. Hatred and being Hurtful is another.

P.S. No Food was eaten during the writing of this blog. *smiling* I'm not even hungry!!! Blame T.T. *giggling*

March 10th

March 10 is Women & Girls HIV & AIDS Awareness Day. It's sad to me that there has to be any Awareness days ever but this one saddens me the most. Why? The stats that says women account for about 1 in 4 new HIV/AIDS cases in the United States. And of these newly infected women, about 2 in 3 are African-American. should make Everyone frown, Just like homosexual men stats in the 1980's. But what is worse are the discussions that come about and the discussions that should come about.

If I hear another gab fest about the stats are high because of the "Down-Low" men messing with the gays one more time I going to vomit. Yes, "Down-Low" men are some of the most vile humans on this earth. But in my opinion All Cheaters are vile. "Down-Low" men are "Cheating men that Cheat with men". And "Down-Low" men are not the only problem. I know & have known quite a few people with HIV & AIDS. 80% are women and 100% of those ladies got it from their heterosexual husbands & boyfriends that got it from another Woman they were involved with in the past or were cheating with presently. People like to play the blame game but instead of playing "Lets Face Facts". Men may catch HIV & AIDS from Unprotected Sex with Women, also. People Having Unprotected Sex May Catch HIV & AIDS.

If you are Having Sex and not in a Monogamous Relationship (if you or your partner are cheating that Is Not monogamous(don't know what monogamous is, stop having sex and get an education)) you need be using Protection. Protection means Condoms (Male or Female) and Dental Dams. Birth Control Pills, Sponges, IUD's & Spermicides do not protect you from Any STD's (or let's not forget those also), HIV & AIDS. Stop gambling with your health and protect yourself. Male and Female Humans are responsible for this. If you are with someone who doesn't believe in Protection Don't be with that person. Saying "No we can't without Protection" and getting up and leaving or telling them to leave is so Easy. You are Worth more than their beliefs. Let's Take Care of Our Selves so We can Take Care of One Another!

Illegal Immigration, Voting , Naturalization and other Taboo Thing for Me to talk About

If you ask me about the issue of illegal immigration I think Hispanics are scapegoats for the problem. Actually the face of illegal immigration should be Canadian because the are actually the highest percentage of illegals in the U. S. Glad I am not a betting woman because I thought it was the Middle Eastern decent (Don't get me started on them. Another Blog Another Day & not a nice one either). But today in Dallas I have to get on my soap box about the Hispanics, their rights, and, redistricting.

In Dallas, the district representation map had to be redrawn and voting on down there at City Hall by the Council. The Hispanics on the council wanted 5 districts but only got 3 with the coveted 2 districts going to African American council to represent. According to the census, those 2 districts are populated by mostly by Hispanics and with the naked eye that could very well be true.

But are the residents mostly occupying these areas legal citizens that are registered to vote. I highly doubt it. You can push me over with a feather if they are. So if the council based redistricting on legal citizens well an African American should represent those areas. And those who feel that is unfair should do two things. 1) Have those who are legal & naturalized citizens that are not registered to vote, REGISTERED TO VOTE.  How can one have the feeling to complain about laws or policies when they don't use their right of influence? How can one know what their voice sounds like if they don't ever use their voice? 2) Those who are living in the those areas illegal, have them become naturalized citizens. People are always protesting about letting illegals staying but whose helping them become legal & naturalized? Very Few. Instead of Marching to stay, March to the Immigration office and do it the right way. (And that's not just for the Mexicans that for anyone here illegally) I'm sorry but until then they don't have a right to be represented. One can't tell anyone how to run anything in a home one has not TRUE right to live. In my opinion that is how those who oppose the new district map of Dallas can Help their coveted constituents Help them gain more influence in Dallas.