Not Interesting in Dating: Denominations of Christianity (A Grey Area)

I’m a Christian. I will not date a non-Christian at all. At this point in life, I will Never be in a relationship where God will debate. We can know each other & be friendly but we will not date. When I was younger I dated guys that were not Christian and there was one that always wanted to debate. I argued back but that was annoying. Unequally yoked dated life is not for "The Diva". 

A Man must basically believe that God is the Father, who provides All that we need, and in him, we Must trust. Jesus is his son and he Died for our sins, Rose again, 40 days later went back to Heaven and preparing a place for us and Will be back again for us one day. And finally, know that we are not without God on this Earth because he sent the Holy Spirit to comfort us until the day his son returns. Also, he must believe that the Bible is the infallible word of God. He has to be wholeheartedly be trying to be the best Christian, he can be and not a stereotype. A man I date must pray every day & throughout the day and have a relationship with God. He must not just own a Bible but read it and sometimes other Christian-based books to help in understanding outside of the church. He must have some kind of church affiliation. I don’t mean he has to go to church every Sunday (but he does need a good reason why he doesn’t). I mean he is a part of a body of believers that he has an Earthly relationship with where he is being fed the word, gives his tithes (Oh, he must be tither) and offering at least and he is encouraged to be the best Man of God he can be. So you ask, what is the problem

Okay, so you know by now because of The Church Switch blog, I grew up in a traditional Southern Missionary Baptist Church, yet I never understood the purpose of Christian denominations. There is Anglican, Christian Science, Baptist, COGIC, Methodist, Catholic, Apostolic, Lutheran, and the list goes on. Why the division? When we get to Heaven, we won't be segregated, why the separation on Earth? Eventually, I decided other than the fact Man has Free-Will, All Christianity denominations are not necessary.  Matter of fact I decided that Christian Denominations and Street Gangs can sometimes act alike. I now go to a Non-Denominational church which is still a Denomination but it’s as close to a “Just Christian” church as I can get.

Well in my dating life, if I only date guys who go to “Non-Denominational” churches, I have limited myself much more than I already have. But I have to be careful on dating Christian men because I have run across some characters. 1. Many don’t understand the difference between Christianity as a Religion and the particular Christian denomination they are affiliated with. You will be surprised by how many adult men answer the question “Are you religious?” Or “What religion do you practice?” with “I’m Baptist, Methodist, Catholic, COGIC, etc., instead of “I’m Christian” and wait for me to then ask “What denomination or type of church do you attend?”. Was I the only one paying attention to World History and learning the difference between Religion & Denominations? 2. Some are so steeped into their denomination that they can be very close-minded. I met a man that was COGIC and he truly believe the “You can’t join in, you have to be born in” of the COGIC Church Anthem. He thought that I was not “Saved & Sanctified” enough because my Christian education was different from his. Both my foundation church & church home were types of churches he felt that was not disciplined enough when teaching the word. 3 The type of guy, well actually person, that has never stepped foot inside a particular church or type of church but believes every report, story, lie or rumor about the place. I had heard about an infamous ATM in the foyer of my church home before attending. It took me months to find this ATM. It’s next to the Bookstore near the original sanctuary that is used for a chapel for bible study, overflow, and youth church. It is not right outside the main sanctuary like people make it seem. My leader of the “Bad Ex” list was one of the people that told me that. I attended that for the 1st time almost 4 months before we broke up. I never told him that, too. Yes, hindsight is so 20/20.

Character type number 1 is doable. It’s all about not knowing the terminology. That’s something I might teach him if he is open. But numbers 2 & 3, I am not interested in dating. It’s too negative. I like open-minded Christian men. I know we all have our reservations about each denomination but to believe them without any kind of experience is wrong. It’s just dating. The dating process was designed to lead me to my future mate, in my opinion. I don’t walk a path without any association with the cobblestones aligning way. None of us do. Never know my mate might not be a Non-Denominational Christian but I do know he will be a member of a Christian church with a welcoming open-mindedness like his and mine. If not then he’s not My Mate.

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

The Church Switch

I am in the population of people who does not attend the church that I grew up in. I only go to that church for weddings and funerals. It was a decision that was years in the making. But a decision that I will never regret and helped form my spiritual being.

I grew up in a traditional Southern Missionary Baptist church. Being the daughter of an Assistant Youth Director and the granddaughter of the Chairman on the Deacon Board and the Church Clerk, 1/3 of my week belonged to the church. I was baptized at eight years, got saved at 13 years old, and caught the Holy Spirit for the 1st time at 16 years old. I was a Youth Usher, Youth Announcement Clerk. I was a substitute BTU (Baptist Training Union) & Children's Church activity leader. I participated in Sunday School & Youth Mission activities at my local church, district, citywide & national events  I did welcomes, speeches, narrations, and devotions. I was upfront and center all the time. 

Somewhere around 14 or 15, I realized I didn't really fit in. My thinking was different from my church peers and church family. I believe in the basics that were taught but the methods & programs, I could not agree with. They weren't wrong, they just were not me. It was hard feeling like that but the older I got the more dissatisfied I was. Soon I realized I could care less about being Baptist. It was more for me to experience in worship. I wasn't ingesting and digesting what was fed to me well. It needed to be something on my level.  I also felt like All Christianity denominations were not necessary. When we get to Heaven, we won't be segregated, why the separation on Earth? So, I decided to bide my time and soon as I could I was leaving. I told no one of my feelings and my decision (Many still don't know and really understand, Oh well!!). When I went off to college I went to church with my friends of other denominations and that furthered my thoughts about my "Christian Church Separation" issue. Matter of fact I decided that Christian Denominations and Street Gangs are alike. I graduated college and returned to church home but that lasted a year and a half. It was me not them. That sounds Cliche' but it is Very True. I had to admit it finally: "I just wanted to be a Christian".

I left there and now I attend a Non-denominational Christian church. I love it. The funny thing is I was not looking to ever go to this church. I only went with my male BFF one New Years' Eve because he just had to go when he moved to the Metroplex. No, I don't get to go all the time (Thank God for Web Streaming & Rebroadcasts). One day I'm going to join a ministry. I'm thinking Medical. What I don't want to be is in front all the time. It feels good to sit there and just take it all in. I'm at the point in life that God's people don't need to hear from me right now. Let them hear from someone else. He has something else for me to do and the "church" limelight is not where I need to do it right now.

I know some people will Never understand people like me. To them, it is like I gave up on my foundation church. To them, it is like I threw a wealth of church knowledge & training away. That is not what I did. I used it to boost me in my Christian growth. If one truly wants to know what anyone who has left knew or that they felt they need help or support felt them in any way. I feel one should ask at least first. I know I don't have to be there physically to support anyone. I just don't like when people feel slighted because someone leaves a church for another church. One never knows what God is ordering them to do. Families support their loved ones in pursuits to better themselves. Church families should Not think any different when it pertains to true Christian growth.

I Thank God for my childhood church. I learned so much from it, in words and experiences. As you see I called it "Foundation Church". Because as I add to this building, I have a strong foundation to build upon. It doesn't crack or shift. I know a few people who have cracked and many that don't have a foundation at all. So I'll never forget about my Foundation Church. It's what holds this building up. You never know when you have to rely on a good hymn or action song to get you through. :)

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Passionate to Death

Did you watch Grey's Anatomy this past Thursday? I know, Stunning!!! The old surgeon that was mentoring Yang DIED in the middle of of a surgery. WoW!!!

It's been said in a few previous blogs that I was raised in a Christian church. So I have heard my share of
ministers dying immediately after they have preached. Both young and old ministers and of all races. I have also heard that was the "Way all Reverends Want to Leave this Earth". Last breath they take is Proclaiming God's Word. I thought it was a "preacher thing". Just like "if the Pastor come to your home to eat, you give him the biggest piece of chicken. Just "stuff" church folk say.

I had Never heard of anyone else "doing that" until Thursday. The old surgeon died saving someone else life and giving sage advice to a younger surgeon he thought had so much potential.

Dying doing the thing you are most passionate about. What a concept!!! Many of us have a Bucket List but have you ever thought about the thing you would want to Do To Death. I've thought about the thing I would do even I never got paid for it. I was told that was "My Career". I found some truth in that, unfortunately. *smiling* The thing you love that you don't mind Dying Doing It. That has to be your "Life's Calling", in my opinion.

Everyone wants to leave here with a smile on there face. I bet doing something you truly Love would give you the BIGGEST smile. A smile that you would light up your funeral so much that no one would think to be sad.

I challenge All of Us to do things that we are "Passionate to Death" about. You might leave this Earth doing it with a Great Big Smile on your face.