Pop Culture's Misuse of Words: Female

Very Smart Brothas & Buzzfeed and others have brilliantly covered this subject (click the the names to read the articles. I've shared & re-posted them.

But I guess no one was reading these articles because the misused of Female keep being disgustingly increased by more & more people. So, now you have to read a blog post based on my know-it-all chatter.

So here are some definitions (And we thank Google):
Female: of or denoting the sex that can bear offspring or produce eggs, distinguished biologically by the production of gametes (ova) that can be fertilized by male gametes

Woman: the female human being, as distinguished from a girl or a man.

Girl: a female child from birth to adulthood

Lady: a woman (used as a polite or old-fashioned form of reference)

Male: of or denoting the sex that produces small, typically motile gametes, especially spermatozoa, with which a female may be fertilized or inseminated to produce offspring

Man: an adult human male or a human being of either sex; a person

Boy: a male child from birth to adulthood

Gentleman: a polite or formal way of referring to a man

People referring to woman as just female is not a new phenomenon to me. I grew up hearing numerous butt hurt, cynical men loitering around various stores, riding public transportation or loudly talking in barbershop or coed salons saying, "These females", "Females can", etc. It went along with all the other disrespectful activities including street harassment that they engaged in.

But now since that behavior is now a part of accepted pop culture (What's Cool), it is strangely easing into everyday conversation in the misuse of female is growing. About 4-5 years ago, I had to have this discussion with Alura, my niece. She was in high school and that was how she talked about girls she didn't like. She's grown age (18-20), now and she curbs the word around me most times but she still says it. Yes, I have hope in her. But the moment that made me type this post happened this past weekend. The star of a web show I really like, referred to the woman that he is in a committed relationship with as his female.Yes, he said "I Am Loyal to My Female". Previously in the interview discussion, the male co-host and he were already misusing female in their opinions about certain behaviors of women. But when he called the woman he’s dating that term, my mental brakes engaged. I almost reached through my phone to clamp his lips. Now, to my calming, his co-star, who is a woman verbally nudged him into saying lady or girlfriend. And he did.

Dear Future Boyfriend(s) and/or Husband,

Take heed! You get one time to refer to me as “My Female” or “The Female I am Dating or Married to” & I know about it. I’ll correct you once. The next time, be ready to verbal spar.

When you refer to a woman no matter how she is behaving to just a female, you have just reduced her to her biological reproductive parts. You don’t think crap about her but not confuse this person’s gender, her sex is her description. As if that woman doesn't have a heart or brain.

In the Buzzfeed article, the author makes a point. "Because nobody casually refers to men as males." What if men were talk about, mentioned based on having penis, scrotum, & testicle? That is what not only using female as the adjective (descriptive word) it says. Female can describe a human, an animal, or a plant. The proper (non-slang) definition of bitch is female dog. When alluding to a woman as just female, you may as well call her a bitch. Some of you all are using that word not to call a woman the slang version of that word anyway. So, recognize the negative take on this word.

I’m not trying to hit anyone of the head with respectability politic. I speak slang. I’ve also had screwy opinions about life that have changed. This is just my know-it-all opinion on how it makes many of us feel. Again I’ve basically heard the “female” used negatively my whole life. It is basically used to complain or disagree with the actions of a woman. When have you ever heard “These females can cook up a storm” or “Females are taking over that company”?

Record it when you do and send that to me. It’s like the attitude is Female are bad but Women are good. Make That Stop, now. Think about who all you are actually talking about when you use the word female. You are not talking about who you disagree with, but also who you agree with also. Oh and ladies if you use the term, you are included yourself, too

So, put some respect & respeck on Female. LoL It’s the disrespectful tone that is hurting us. It hurt us when it was just used in the streets. It is hurting us more since it didn’t die there. And until we stop inflicting pain on each other, I am Not finished, I am Not done.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Now If I Acted Like Miss Piggy… Yeah Sis, Bro, I’m Ok, but I Shouldn’t Have to Be

Want to know how Miss Piggy handles Catcalling & Street Harassment click Here 

Thursday, July 10 at 12 p.m. EST, News One will host a Twitter chat on Black women and street harassment. Follow the conversation at #YouOKSis on Twitter.com.

I get tired of people not understanding that Women, Gay Men and their bodies are Not a free for all, disrespectful playground. I’ll never understand when Street Harassment became the norm for vile and vulgar men & women (Yes, there are populations of lesbians are doing it women too.) to do. Grabbing somebody by the arm, saying “Say, Say. Give me those tens” is a gross form of how you should ask for a date. It’s even worse to call the person “Stuck up” or insults the person with profanities just because they don’t want to get to know you. They know enough. You are ignorant. Who wants to date anyone ignorant? Sad part is we've become a fearful population that if we complain, we are the bad guys. If we don't respond to these harassers with a “Yes” we are part of the problem. I’m tired of hiding my cell phone because I have to give some fool a fake number and just in case he call it to see if my phone will ring so I can feel safe. I’m tired of seeming like I might snap wild if you speak to me in public. This is crazy. Street Harassment is humiliating and can be dangerous.

To the men & women who are not doing it getting upset because awareness and discontinuing it is being discuss. You are not helping at all. Saying stuff like “If he was cute, it would be okay, “Not all Men are doing that”, “This is a Device from the White man to keep Black folks from dating”. Instead of getting upset, listen and help stop this heinous act. You know many that do it and not saying anything to them & continuing to hang with someone who does. You know that is a low-key way to say you agree. Many of you complainers have never had one discussion about Street harassment with a young man who does it or young women who has or might experience. How many of you have told a girl, you know about Street Harassment. Yet you can fix your mouth to complain or defend your right not to want to hear about it. Here is an article for you to read http://newsone.com/3033217/youoksis-feminista-jones-street-harassment-notjusthello/

I know about Street Harassment to well. I still remember when it was just referred to as “Cat Calling” (Which very gross and derogatory term in itself. And men have the nerve not to want to be referred dogs.) in Pop Culture. Miss Piggy experienced the “classic” definition of 1980’s Cat Calling. All she was trying to do was spy on Kermit and these construction workers (the "classic" face of Cat Calling) are interrupting her in a vulgar manner. Now days Miss Piggy would get arrested for going off. It's bad that as a child I understood what those guys were doing was wrong. Street Harassment happens everywhere. The street, grocery store, the mall, hallways of the middle & high schools, the paths of the local university (Yes, that group of guys standing around the front of the Science or English building always have something to say), bus stops, and many other places. The bus stop was where my worse encounter happened.

It was the first time I unloaded my pepper spray on anyone. I don’t drive. So I was waiting on the bus for my morning commute to summer school at one of the community colleges one summer. A car slowed down and the driver rolled down the window and spoke. Anything people know about me is I don’t answer to “Hey Baby”, “Say Baby”, “Psst (that makes me furious and has gotten some people cussed out)”, etc., or talk to people who want to converse from their cars or have grabbed my hand as I was walking by. The guy, who was Hispanic (It’s not just black guys but you knew that) said “Can I have your number”. I said “No”. He asked “Did I need a ride”? I said, “No, Thank you”. He said “Well fine then” and drove off. He made the block came back and said “Are you sure” I said “Yeah, I’m sure”. After that I thought he was gone. Nope, he was just getting started. He decided to drive around the block to taunt me 3 times before the bus came. I boarded that bus so quick and went to school. Hours later I’m coming home and I decided to get off a few blocks from my stop because the bus driver was taking his 15 minute break. It’s hot and as heck and low and behold here is the guy from earlier. He slowing down and I keep walking. He saying “Hey Baby. Give me your number”. I keep walking. He stopped the car and gets out and is walking towards me. I am 8 steps away from turning onto my street. He said “Look B-word. I’m talking to you”. I unloaded the Pep Squad on his face. This is the Pep Squad. 

 My sister gave this to me when I first went off to college. I took off to my home. I didn’t know if he saw where I went. I didn’t know if he would be back for me the next day. I stayed scared for weeks. I never saw him again, Praise God. Oh yeah, y'all know I stay in the hood, right. Where were the loitering fools around the bus stop and liquor store that day? Right there laughing at the encounter that afternoon. Nobody asked me was I ok or needed help. Matter fact I bet dollars to donuts, one of those guys probably asked me for my number prior to or after the incident. To them, I’m just a bougie chick that just went off that day. No, I was fed-up chick spraying for my safety.

All this because I said No. I said it was my worse. My worse was very extreme. It is not my only. I don't know any lady or Gay man that has not experienced this crap. Crazy part is is so common they may not even recognize it as wrong. 

What is wrong with No? No, First off, what was wrong with you approaching me with a “Hello, How are you”, away from your car? Then what was wrong with me rejecting you. I have the right to say No!!! I have the right Not to Fear for my life because I said No!!! Everybody has those rights. No One has the right to harass anyone for a date, though.

Yeah sister & brother, I am ok. But I really want People stop that. Cat Calling, Heckling for Dates all Street Harassment is wrong. It very disrespectful. Its cliché’ to ask but would you want anyone to do that to your mother or father? Don’t answer that because many of you don’t respect the well-being of your family members. It past just a "hello". It's past "you were just speaking" It is your speech that it the problem. It's disrespectful. It’s about respect. What is wrong with Respect???

Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms