Girl Code Conversation

Spoiler Alert Warning. Did you watch the latest episode of The Game? No! Did you want to? Yes! Then Stop Reading This Now!!!

On the latest episode of The Game, the singer Ciara (she plays herself on the show) finds out her friend, Keira, slept with a guy, Blue, she slept with previously. She didn't handle it well. Keira's defense was she only Ciara only slept with him once in a One Night Stand situation. Ciara still felt that "The Girl Code" was violated and currently not speaking to Keira

Ladies, are we having the "Girl Code" conversation with our friends? I know I've touch on this subject before but it seems like it needs to be discussed in depth. What is the Girl Code? Yes, it a good show on MTV that came out ten years to late. I could have been GREAT on that show. I am talking about THE GIRL CODE.  According to Internet and me, Girl Code is the rules of female friendship Every Girl should know. Madame Noire gives a good top ten list (http://madamenoire.com/44987/girl-code-10-friendship-commandments-every-girl-should-know/). Check it out! So, we know what it is, well at least the top ten. Do you have a code? Are we actually talking about them with our friends? Do we just wait until a random subject arises and talk about them? Do you wait until a problem arises and talk about them?

I don't think You can't get mad at the offenders of the Girl Code in your life if you never say I follow these set of rules. It didn't seem like Ciara & Keira did. Girl Code seems not to be always universal. Every Friendship (actually every person) bases their codes on different set of rules. Some folks share men/women within the friendship. Some people are okay if you date their ex. I have friends that it is understood don't touch my man, exes, crushes or any man I've ever slept with (even the whack ones). Some friends I've had to "Girl Code" about a man. My friends know we're not Twins or a Singing Group and I don't want to dress alike. I don't even want to be in the same color most times. Somebody has to change. I have and I will again. I have friends who feel whatever they tell you it is okay to tell and talk about it with others in the group when they other are around. I also have a friend or two that will beat everybody involved if they find you said they said they sneezed. My friends know that if they get the disclaimer "I Bet Not Hear This Again" from me, then mums the word. No disclaimer, then it a free for all to tell.

The "Girl Code" Conversation is more than just a Do/Don't list do this to be friends with anyone. It should be an open discussion to help strengthen your friendship or let people realize we are not a good fit to be friends. A lot fights could be avoided if ladies were having a Girl Code conversations.

What is your Girl Code with your friends? Has anyone ever broken your Girl Code? Are they still your friend? Have you ever been a Girl Code Offender? Leave a comment below and then go have a Girl Code talk with your friends, even if you've had it before. You never know somebody might need a reminding. *smiles*

Happy to be in My Thirties, Today!!!

*Warning: If you watch "The Game" on BET or "How Men Become Dogs" on the Issa Rae channel on YouTube and are not current... Spoiler Alert!!!*

Popular television has made me Realize, I am Glad I am out of my 20's. I am so glad I did what 20 - 29 year olds do when they are that age. I went where they go when I was in my 20's. And mostly elated I learned what I needed to know then Because, I plan not to go back.

On the show "The Game", there are two characters Blue & Keira. Blue is a rookie football player and Keira is a former child star, trying to get back in the business. He was very attracted to her while; she was still on the fence. Along the way they have struck up a friendship that ended up with them on one random, unplanned night, having sex. Keira was virgin and Blue didn't know that fact. He finds out from another player, Malik, because Malik thought he was lying on her. Blue confronts Keira and angrily tell her they can't be friends because she didn't tell him. After finding out both side of the story, Malik explains to Keira why Blue is mad. Men supposedly don't want to be a woman's first because the woman become clinging. Keira ends up drunk and want to talk to Blue. After throwing up on his floor and his jeans, Blue and Keira decide friendship is not bad.

Now the age I am now, I don't understand why he was so upset. This is why you don't randomly have sex with anyone out having Sex Talks. Everything we do has consequences. Unplanned Sex is not an exception to the rule. It's probably one of the reasons why there is a rule. Upset because she didn't tell him she was a virgin. That's why you don't assume. Before people have sex with anyone they even think they want to have sex with better ask questions. One never know what cards could get laid out. Even as friends, he could find out. Friends talk about their sex lives. Keira is wrong also. You have one first. Nobody should be that willing to give it up that they don't think to speak up. What if it was not all that grand? And I'm going to leave it at that.

Now a web show called "How Men Become Dogs", we have Cameron who has been dumped by his girlfriend Jessica for not being aggressive enough. Cameron and his friends start taking "Dog" classes. Well while taking classes Cameron starts secretly seeing Jessica's friend, Brandy. Brandy approached him at a party and gave him her number and that is the start of their secret rendezvous. At a pool party, Jessica finds out about Brandy and Cameron. While Cameron is clearly dealing with seeing Jessica, Brandy comes by and tell Cam she talked to Jessica and basically got a go ahead. She wants to know if she is only the rebound chick also confesses her love for him. He tells her he's not sure what love even is. She tells him to get his feelings together or lose her too.

I need to know Brandy so bad. Brandy needs to be my cousin or niece so, I could teach her The Girl Code & How to know you are the Rebound. The Girl Code to date your friend's ex is simple; Don't!!! Rebound status is almost as simple. Any point when a person is willing to creep with you, a red flag needs to go up. If you try to confront your issues with the creeping and they blow you off, a red flag should go up. If they go MIA after seeing their ex, a red flag needs to wave high. Cameron is a mess too. No, he is the mess. I don't care if you trying to be a dog. Dogs got to heal too. How about before he took the "dog" classes, he should have gotten himself together. People are going to learn not to make decisions with a broken heart.

Now y'all understand why I don't miss my 20's. I saw the light bulb come on when I turned 30 but, I never thought about the lessons I have already learn. Never thought about how clear they would become when seeing others make crazy mistakes (even if they are on TV). Oh well, onto learning more from my 30's. Got a while before 40 and I bet older Outspoken_Diva is laughing at me now.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms