My Chosen Family

I love the quote "Friends are the Family, God Let me Choose". I have a wonderful group of friends. God has really blessed me with great people in my life. I have 4 Best Friends and 6 Close Friends. More Like 4 siblings and 6 cousins.

Last year I had to end my longest friendship (Almost 25 years) ever. It took me actually a year and a half to end it because it hurt so bad. What was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back? For the 2nd year, she didn't say "Happy Birthday" to me. That sounds petty but this was the only person for 10 years who knew not to call me right at Midnight on that day because I am praying. She always waited until 12:15 am.

I don't meet strangers but I didn't keep friends growing up. I look back on my younger life and I didn't have many true friends, just mostly family-approved children I socialized with. I had to admit she was just another one of those. Our older lives are so different and our friendship did not mirror the qualities possessed by my other friendships. It was time. It was becoming very one-sided. She probably ended her friendship with me years ago. Probably hasn't even noticed I chose to leave her life.

But over that year and a half, I noticed my friend's values and goals mirrored mine. My friend's basic lifestyles mirrored mine. Their standards mirrored mine. Their hearts mirrored mine. Their love for God mirrored mine.

That's not a coincidence. That's God! It's why nothing I say shocks these people into thinking I'm loony toons. It's why time, space, secrets or distance doesn't not define these friendships. I don't have a friend that I can't call to pray for me whenever about whatever. God knows who I need as friends and he knows who I need to be a friend to.

I thank God for my Friends. I don't take that title lightly. I hope I am a Friend to them as well as they are to me. I don't need to name names they know (Watch one of them say "No, I wanted my name called"). I love You Guys!!!

The Revues are In...

Happy New Year!
Hope 2013 found you Keeping It Cute.
Diva is a little under the weather with the crud of the season. Since I'm actually bed-ridden, you know the opinions came streaming in.
I decided I better clear up an announcement I made over Social Media.

I'm Out_Spoken_Diva. So of course there are some things I do in life with a little flair, drama, and attention. This one, I decided to be just that do it Dramatically.

If you follow me on Twitter or was fortunate to be a part of the my personal conversations on Facebook You know as of Jan. 1st I Semi-Retired from the world Male Revue Watching. Yes, semi-retired. I'm realistic. I'm FBF with Revuers. Revuers and I follower each other on Twitter. And I am Pals with one in real life.

I am just limiting my viewing that's all. Umm mostly to FB and YouTube.
WHY?
1. It's cheaper. I remember back in 2008, 2009 A friend and I could be sharing the same $10 tip money leave and have money left over to hit a fast food place. Now not only are some of these shows cover fees higher, they have the nerve to have better Revuers with good shows worth the dollars. LoL The last Revue every revuer was good. Every revuer got some kind of tip. What happened to sorry revuers that let me keep my money or take a restroom break. LoL Yes, a restroom break.
2. The real reason! Okay before 2011, I was went to maybe 2 revues every 3 years. Now I have been to 4 revues in 2 years. I don't care if there are women that are at revues every week and weekend. That is a lot for me. I feel desperate to see...uh huh...that. Especially when I was at them on two consecutive birthdays. Yes, It was for someone else birthday event. Yes I plan the trip because a friend wanted to finally see a particular revuer Yes, It was a bestie's going away event. But I was still there. Heck I was the one doing the research & planning so we only went certain particular ones (Hello I said I was pals with a... I don't just go to any ol' show that's any and everywhere).  I even think my conversation was leaning towards "Ooh girl DaDaDa is..." . Like I'm desperate to see it or something. And y'all know I'm not even like that. Time to reel it in some.
Now by my math I'm suppose to be Semi-Retired for about 6 years. I could do it. I mean y'all know I've gone without Chocolate for over twice as long. I Liked, Really Liked Chocolate. But I not going to say 6 years. I'm going to stay Semi-Retired until I get "The Diva's" priorities back in "Diva" fashion (Yep, Quiet and Calm). It could be tomorrow or never I go to another show. As long as I get that part of my life in shaped up to my standards.

Yeah I'll miss it. Y'all know I like a good show. The more creative, the better.  Anybody can gyrate to a R. Kelly song or Body Freak some random lady to 2 Chainz's Birthday Song. But a Revuer that Does a HeadStand under waterfall of bady oil & milk to I Have Nothing by Whitney Houston or Do Body Ticks and Splits all over a stage to a Techo song gets the dough. But I have pull the reigns in before this horse runs wild in my life. People can invite me to them. If you are planning to go to one, please invite me. That helps me know my progress. Just don't be shocked if I decline because I'm still Semi-Retired

So the Revues are in. I am out until I let you know I'm back in.

As always Talking to you in Adult Terms... *wink*

"Catfish" My New Television Guilty Pleasure

 *Spoiler Warning*

Okay, It's no secret that I don't watch many popular reality shows. You know the ones that Wives, Hip Hop, Bachelor, Bachelorette, Bad, Club, or Chrissy in the title of it. I don't watch them. Yes, it gets me stared at crazy by many I know. I don't relate at all. I just don't understand all that fighting and you are not competing for a Large Cash Grand Prize or Job (Like RuPaul's Drag Race, Big Brother, or Amazing Race) or Not Relatives (Like Mary Mary) Yes, the Parentheses are shows I watch and I have some "Guilty Pleasure" shows I do watches like Cheaters, Toddlers and Tiaras, and Bridezillas. Well, there is an addition to the "Guilty Pleasures" list and its name is Catfish the TV Show.

It is derived from a Documentary about a guy who meets his online love and finds out she was not who she said was. Well after the movie aired the man was bombarded with emails with people with online love horror stories. The show is about that same guy helping people find out if their online lovers are lying or not. So far in five episodes, no one is telling the truth. I have faith though. It may be the Season finale but I have faith somebody will be telling the truth. (Yes, you can laugh).

The show is a trip. There is an episode with a lady who was a stripper and thought she dating a childless male stripper. The male stripper was a husky guy with children that was supposed to be the male stripper's promoter. There is the episode where a young lady thought for almost 2 years she was talking to a guy and it was a cruel prank of an ex-boyfriend's current girlfriend. The girlfriend was Not remorseful at all because she just wanted the girl to leave her boyfriend. I pray that the young lady learns better and more mature conflict management. *sigh* Then there was the most interesting case to date to me. The lady had a boyfriend who wanted to marry her. Yet, she had a 10-year online romance that she wanted to meet to make a decision.

I try to watch this show with an open mind. This could happen to anyone. There are so many liars out there in the world. But like Cheaters, I think it is sad that this show is even needed. People don't use common sense or are too lazy to do the "homework" on someone before meeting one another and even worse catching feelings. A central theme I see is almost Anuptahobic people trying to date. They are so scared to be alone that they accept these obvious lies. I'm sorry "Never being able to meet" is an obvious lie. Especially if for longer than 3 months if you live in the same city, in my opinion, is a bald-faced lie. Who never has time if they are single and telling the truth? Even if you met while both were grocery shopping. I understand long-distance love puts a strain on the meeting but listen to what they say when you finally become able to meet.

As for being too lazy to do the Homework, it amazed me how everyone has at least a Facebook page on this show. Yet, no one looks through the page fully. Many of the clues are found on the Facebook pages of the offender. They go to a Modeling school in India. Friends of the offender have the same pictures as the offender that happens to look just like the offender. While we texting each other I'd be all on their page.  If "Bells" went off enough to email Catfish Ummm "Bells" should have gone off for you to do your own investigating. If he could find it...

I date No One without doing All my homework. As I get older and add to my dating experience, the amount of homework has increased. I've dated online men before. Met the man to become one of my best friends that way (That was a Confession). I also met the Best Liar in the World ever (trust me he increased my amount of homework) online also.  We always met in a public place. Sometimes I brought my friends along, just in case a dude stood me up. Never had it to happen. But we always met within a month. And if we can't meet, I tell the dude to lose my number (Hey, am I wrong for saying "Lose my Number" to dismissed guys? Just Curious!). In the words of Sweet Brown "Ain't Nobody got Time Fah Dat".

So, that's my new "Guilty Pleasure", Catfish the TV Show. I'm going to watch Catfish the Documentary one day. I want to see this guy's journey. I do know him and the girl became good friends. Okay let me catch the latest episode with my fingers crossed the "offender" is true blue. LoL

Putting Your Fork in Someone Else's Plate

Okay, the title of this blog need work. Sounds unsanitary! Oh well! Earlier this year Chef & TV Host Mario Batali and his family and recently Newark Mayor Cory Booked lived on Food Stamps for a week. They did it to get an understanding of how it is to live on them. Though there are many critics, I think what they did is very courageous.

I've never personally lived on Food Stamps. I've done papers on the Food Stamps Program.  I have eaten food bought by Food Stamps. I have paid for the toiletries and medications of a few people who have lived on Food Stamps. I have hugged and dried the tears of someone who is on Food Stamps.

I was furious when there were cities such as New York considered ending the Food Stamp program. Ending the Food Stamp Program is horrible. If anything the Food Stamps program needs to be regulated. I've seen people buy birthday and wedding cakes with Food Stamps. I keep hearing there are places where Soda, Alcohol, and Tobacco can be bought. So I understand the frowning at the dysfunction. But before leaders eliminate it have they tried to fix it? No, because they don't have a clue on how they understand it. Can't fix what you don't understand. But instead of being educated, you just do away with it. Wow, that seems like a productive attitude.

Leaders that have a "Do Away with It" attitude act like All of those on Food Stamps Want to be on Food Stamps. I'm not saying "The Career Food Stamp Recipient" is a myth. It's Just not the only picture about those who receive Food Stamps. The number of abusers of the system is low. Even some of the abusers abuse out of desperation. I said I have paid for the non-food items for some on Food Stamps. Everybody does not have people that can buy toilet tissue or soap for them to help them out. Some people have people who will do it but at a cost. So many feel they have to "sell" their stamps for cash. Remember this is to buy food. Where is the money to buy non-food items, go to non-food places, or pay the non-food bills? This is not Cash. It doesn't pay for everything in life.

Again I applaud Mario Batali, Cory Booker, and other leaders that are trying to understand. The saying says Put your Foot in Someone Else's Shoe and I bet it will Pinch. Put your Fork on Someone Else's Plate and I bet the Food will Taste Different.

My Thoughts! What are Yours???

16th Birthday Party Stripper

So, a mom hired a stripper for her son's 16th birthday and the parents of the party guests are outraged. I can't even believe I am shocked. This was bound to happen This was bound to be reported. The authorities are investigating to find out if any inappropriate sexual acts occurred.

The mother is not the unbelievable adult in this case. I'll get on her in a minute. The stripper was wrong also. Ummm is it so hard out there for strippers that dancing for children for the right dollar amount is okay in their minds. She may not have known before getting to the event but she knew when she got there that the group was underage. She should have left. I don't know what she made in tip. Most Teenagers don't have "Bands to make Huh Dance". But I guess a Buck is a Buck & Anything for it. I hate to think if they find out if anything more than dancing happened. Arrest her please.

I was 25 years old going to bachelorette party at a club. One of the dancers was a guy that grew up with my older sister & older cousins and knew me as a kid. He wouldn't let me in until he saw my ID himself. So all the dancers are not dancing for the underage.

Okay let talk Ms. Obvious, the mother. It is equivalent to Dads hiring prostitutes for their sons. Yes, I think that is wrong also. How do parents think their children will have healthy attitudes about sex? What will her son have to look forward to when he becomes legal age to look at strippers? She is clearly a parent that trying to be the child's friend. This is immature and irresponsible. Who wants to see their child enjoy a stripper?  The parents of the party guests probably ripped her a new one. I would have. Police calling me about some stripper she hired for a party my kid was at. Now I have ask my child for the truth. Allow the investigators to question my child. If more than dancing went on then there's going to be a trial. Way to much.

Strippers Do Not belong at birthday party of those under the legal age. Legal age may change form state to state but I'm sure 16 years old is not legal.

Retail Ungratefulness...

Okay I will say that I don't participate in Black Friday. I don't understand it. I know Many that do. I spend Black Friday sleeping and resting from Thanksgiving festivities. Now Cyber Monday, that's when I start the my little shopping.

Black Friday this year is unreal. It all starts Thursday, Thanksgiving Day. I've seen some stores opening as early as 6:00 am Thursday. My problem is not with the shoppers, it with the stores. Thanksgiving mean nothing to them. That apparent they put Christmas out right after Halloween. Their employees mean nothing to them. Have them working instead of being at home for the holiday. Instead of being Grateful all for being able to be a store and take a moment to say Thank You, they rather run them into ground by working them all these hours dealing with sale hungry customers.

Target says they are listening to their customers by being opened early. Target, in my opinion, is listening to the dollar bill. All these stores are listening to the dollar bill. I won't be surprised if being opened Thursday won't bring out the crowds that they think they will get. I won't be surprised some people are still gonna act up if what they want is out. I won't be surprised that opening Thursday won't bring in the revenue they think they will bring in. I will  be surprised if their employees don't feel abused and misused.

A store is about the workers and customers. Only half of the store is being heard. Let the employees off that day and enjoy their holiday like everyone else.

So I guess this year I spend the shopping holiday Cooking, watching the Macy's Day Parade and Eating with my Family. Because Black Friday starts on Thursday. Now that I'm thinking about it Thanksgiving get NO LOVE. Already only have a Few Holiday songs for the occasion. Now Black Friday is honing in on it's day. *sigh* I still celebrate you Thanksgiving. *BIG* Hug!!!

Alright that's how I feel. If you are out this Black Whatever day Be Safe & Pick me out something nice. Can't go wrong with Diamonds. *smile*

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Passionate to Death

Did you watch Grey's Anatomy this past Thursday? I know, Stunning!!! The old surgeon that was mentoring Yang DIED in the middle of of a surgery. WoW!!!

It's been said in a few previous blogs that I was raised in a Christian church. So I have heard my share of
ministers dying immediately after they have preached. Both young and old ministers and of all races. I have also heard that was the "Way all Reverends Want to Leave this Earth". Last breath they take is Proclaiming God's Word. I thought it was a "preacher thing". Just like "if the Pastor come to your home to eat, you give him the biggest piece of chicken. Just "stuff" church folk say.

I had Never heard of anyone else "doing that" until Thursday. The old surgeon died saving someone else life and giving sage advice to a younger surgeon he thought had so much potential.

Dying doing the thing you are most passionate about. What a concept!!! Many of us have a Bucket List but have you ever thought about the thing you would want to Do To Death. I've thought about the thing I would do even I never got paid for it. I was told that was "My Career". I found some truth in that, unfortunately. *smiling* The thing you love that you don't mind Dying Doing It. That has to be your "Life's Calling", in my opinion.

Everyone wants to leave here with a smile on there face. I bet doing something you truly Love would give you the BIGGEST smile. A smile that you would light up your funeral so much that no one would think to be sad.

I challenge All of Us to do things that we are "Passionate to Death" about. You might leave this Earth doing it with a Great Big Smile on your face.