Ok Class! Today's Lesson, A Sex Tape!!!

Just last night Bestie Boo, LJ and I were talking last night about me being a prude. We agreed that I have "prudish moments". I call it "Clutch My Pearls Time". Then this morning I hear about a teacher accidentally showing her middle school students her sex tape. Here's the Article. Well it's "Clutch My Pearls Time".

All I could do was sigh. I totally believe it was an accident. I believe if she was trying to lure a child she would have done it in a small setting not the whole class. I maybe being naïve but I will accept her doing this on accident. My question is "Why does she have a sex tape"? Not because she is a teacher but because she is a human. Has anyone learned anything from the celebrities? Am I the only one that has learn "Sex Tapes Will Be Seen, No Matter What"? If she didn't have a sex tape, she would not have shown it to her students. No one at this point in history show still be making or own a sex tape. If you still have sex tape go get and smash it and all (yes All) the copies because it will be seen by eyes that it was not intended for. Those eyes may see it by accident like these students. Those eyes may see it because the person you made the tape with is braggingly showing people. I have seen a few sex tapes and that is how I saw them. One of the "stars" was showing it off to an audience and the other "star" didn't know. So go smash, burn, and destroy your sex tapes.

And before you ask, "No I have not destroyed my sex tape because i don't have one". I think they are stupid and don't need to know what I look like having intercourse. If you see me in one, Let Me Know!!! I Promise any and everybody, that that person will feel some kind of pain. Pain to the body, Pain to the finances, or Pain to their reputation. So let's pray I am not "starring" in any. I'm unclutching my pearls now. This prudish moment is over.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Help Me Understand: The Barbie Back Lash

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I had a few Barbie dolls. I had a Happy Holidays one,

a Nigerian one,

and a Malibu one.

I even had the “Barbie-like” doll “Lookin’ Smart Maxie.

I had lots of dolls growing up. I was, no, I am very girly. So stereotypically, that included playing with dolls. Oh I loved playing church with my dolls, because that was the only way “playing church” was allow at our home.

Okay I said I’m “girly”, so maybe I’m not as “feminist” as others. Another thing I am confused about with the “feminist” agenda is its anti-Barbie stance. I get that girls need positive images to look up to. That is Very important. But Barbie is not positive because of the way she looks. These “suggested” Barbie-like dolls

are better because they supposedly looks like what average women look like. Wow, that is interesting.

I’ll say it. It’s a doll. Barbie is a doll. Barbie is a toy. Amazing how no one is upset with all these jobs she has had. Here is a partial list.

Aerobics instructor

Art teacher

Dance teacher

Elementary teacher

Special Education Teacher

Yoga Teacher

Gymnastics Coach

Football Coach

Dentist

Doctor

Nurse

Surgeon

Veterinarian

Ballerina

Fashion Model

The average woman is not doing all those jobs. She doesn’t have the time like Barbie has. The stress of all these jobs would kill the average woman. Well they all would kill me at least. Also do all these “suggested” dolls have Barbie’s career credentials? I bet they don’t.

Poor Barbie she gets all the blame. That cute little 6 year old Outspoken_Diva, above, used to sneak these two in church.

So do we blame the Strawberry Shortcake dolls for her church mischief? I do own many fruity fragrant body sprays. Interesting!

This Hugga Bunch doll, is she the cause for my Plus Size look? Her name was Tickles. She was sadly decapitated by my cousin, DD. I loved this doll. Might explain this hairstyle that I wear often. LoL

Oh all the negative images girls take in daily, a doll is one of the causes. Help me understand, why.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

The Story Behind “Yes, Yes, Yes”

Last month I wrestled with releasing two blogs. This one and one about funeral gossipers. Funeral gossipers, stop that crap. Asking me questions before, all through & after the service. I always attract one. This time I semi-avoided one for one to come sit right beside my sister and me. I see so and so way over there on the other side of the building, up in the balcony. Maybe I’ll get to speak to them AFTER the services.  I don’t know if so and so is still with so and so. No, I ain’t heard from so and so, stop asking me about them. Oh if we are friendly, maybe talk on Social Media sometime, you can do a little catching up. This last one I was around those people too. I always enjoy a joke of two for this one lady I know. She always cracks me up. As for folks I have not seen & talked to in years, “Be Quiet” & “Stop Being Nosey”. Ok that’s enough of that. Quite a few folks get that "Shaddup" look because of that. Now y’all see why people think I’m a jerk. I know y’all, I’m trying to be more tolerant.

Now onto today’s blog. Okay maybe you have noticed on Social Media, especially if you know me offline and you are a Facebook friend, that I have be using the phrase “Yes, Yes, Yes”, when I agree with something. It is a New personal joke. And I have decided to tell you the story behind it.

So last month, the pastor of my foundation church passed away. I went to the wake and the funeral. The services were very befitting of him. It was not a "funeral" but a "Celebration of Life". Oh and I actually saw My Funeral Fantasy come true. (When my mother passes, I want my siblings & me to view the body last when we come in. Last as in all our relatives view before us, also. I hate being touched.) Well the song the eulogist sang to close out the funeral was “I Know the Lord Will Make a Way”. Here are the lyrics.

Verse
I know the Lord will make a way, yes, He will.
I know the Lord will make a way, yes, He will.
He'll make a way for me and for you,
Jesus will see you safely through;
I know the Lord will make a way, yes, He will.


Chorus
Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

I know the Lord will make a way,
oh yes, He will.

(He'll make a way)
yes, yes, yes.

(for me and for you)
yes, yes, yes.

(Jesus will see you)
yes, yes, yes.

(safely through)
yes, yes, yes.

I know the Lord will make a way,
oh yes, He will.

Dear readers, I found out I have been singing this song wrong all my life. Where the lyrics say “Yes, Yes, Yes” I had been singing “Yes, Lord, Yes”. Matter fact at some point in life I might have been singing “Yes, Lawd, Yes”. I really like this song. My heart gets lots of joy singing this song. All my life, I have been wrong. It was like my ears and eyes were finally in tune with what everybody was singing. I wanted to laugh so hard at myself but I was at a funeral. That was not the time to laugh. (They might have thought I was in “holy laughter”. Yeah I know I’m reaching.)

So now when you see “Yes, Yes, Yes”, you can laugh along with me. I give you permission this time. Key phrase is This Time. You have to laugh at yourself. It is stupid to take yourself serious all the time. If you sometimes do silly thing like I do, it is downright crazy to take yourself serious all the time. But I know the Lord will make a way for me to stop doing such silly things so more. Oh yes he will, Yes! Yes, Yes, Yes!!!


Oh the latest profile picture is what I actually look like on that day. I call it the "Bapti-Costal" LMBO Yes, Yes, Yes,
  As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

 

 

Time for March

March is Women's History Month so get ready for a few blogs featuring Woman Champions and also a “Help Me Understand”. Let’s just say this “Help Me Understand” has a love/hate relationship that I don’t get.

March is also National Nutrition Month.  We including me need to eat better. I’ve been using a Pinterest for my food diary. OMG it is so effective because I actually see that I eat crappy and I’m a Nutritional Consultant. We have to do better. 

National Reading Day is March 2. As an Avid reader I urge you to READ. Reading is so important. Too many people don't read. I believe Don't Read and Can't Read are the same thing. Either way you are Not reading!

National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day is March 10. Again it’s sad to me that there has to be any Awareness days ever but this one saddens me the most. Why? The stats that says women account for about 1 in 4 new HIV/AIDS cases in the United States. And of these newly infected women, about 2 in 3 are African-American. Everyone should frown. The fact that HIV/AIDS exist should make us frown.

March 10^th is also my anniversary of me being “Radical”. If by now you don’t know what “Radical” for me is, shame on you. Go Read what it is Here. Not telling you the number, this the internet. March 10^th is not the day I decided to go Radical. I have no clue what day that was. I was going through then so all the days ran together then. March 10^th was the last day I was Not Radical. Why do I called it “Being Radical?”

1.  The method. There wasn’t one. I just did it.

2.   For some odd reason not doing it is strange, uncommon, weird, crazy, drastic, dramatic… Radical

Was I planning to make it to make it this long? NO!!! But some time in, I realized I could not just give it up all willy nilly. This was really part of my life.  Do I regret it? NO!!! I have gotten so much sleep since going Radical. Yes, I am laughing, too. Seriously, I have my days, weeks, and months that I think I went crazy. Then I think “No, Crazy was those years ago when you didn’t see the "Real" you when you looked in the mirror. Crazy was when I was crying all the time because I was connected to those that had unplugged from me and was too dumb not realize it. I think I'm a better person for it. So will "Radical" make it to next year? I don't know. I am human. God willing, YES!!!

So, that is the month of March. Go celebrate the ladies. Eat Better. Read, it Fundamental. Don’t have sex or at least Protect yourself having it. Those last statements seem so cliché. Oh well it gets my point across.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

My Problem with the Queens' Slanguage

There is no secret I hang out with a few gay people. I hang out with anyone who seems fun to hang out with and I can learn from. Okay I'm beating around a bush. The best way to say this is to use the show “Will and Grace.” There are two gay men on the show, Will and Jack. I don't prefer not hang out with the "Jacks" in life. They say things and have actions that bother me. Not the stereotypical flitting around, snapping fingers, and switching that is seems to be a synonymous. I mean taking offensive language and acting as though it is okay. I mean the "they are the end all to be all" attitude. It bothers me. I don't hang out with heterosexuals that behave this way and I will not hang out with homosexuals that do it as well. What you think you are celebrating is Very Insulting. Your celebration is based on stereotypes.

I would love to blame Perez Hilton for this blog. “Inside every gay man is a fierce Black woman!” Then after getting school about offensive language by Black Twitter, he in turn said got upset and compared Black women to Hitler. Yeah, he didn't get it but do we expect a person whose claim to fame is to gossip and out people to get it.  I would love to blame Woman who like Men who like Men for this blog. They should tell them “Umm not Cool” at some point. I can't blame RuPaul’s Drag Race for this blog. I love the show but this past episode, Season 6 premiere, made me want to throw a shoe towards a few contestants. Let’s another one say “Fish” or any of its types or “Okaaay”, one more time. The blame lies with me and anyone else who feels this way, for not saying something long time ago. We knew it bothered us and instead of avoiding the problem, it is the inferno that it is. Let me start with my Top 5 issues.

5.    All dowdy dressing Women, no let me say people, do not need a Fairy Gay-Mother to teach them to dress. They need someone to who has fashion understanding to help them. Your sexuality does not qualify to tell someone how to dress.

4.    All Plus Size women are not to be compared to other Plus Size Divas, especially the ones that can Saaang. (This goes for Churchy and wanna be Churchy people also (Tamela Mann, who seems like she is a nice lady, is not my cousin. )). I just stop giving Martha Wash side eye because in high school, there was a man I did my dietary intern with that said I reminded him of the “Classic Disco Diva” every day. All I did was make food trays and wash dishes. I wore scrubs like them and if I got a break, I was doing my homework. I can't even sing. It is not the compliment you think it is.

3.    All Plus Size and Dowdy women, heck women period, don’t make “Good Hags”.

We all are not “Sisters in the Discrimination Struggle”. That woman you have stereotyped maybe a homophobe. Meet her first before making her your next BFF based on a look and an action.

2.    “Fierce Black Woman” is not a compliment. It is a mythical stereotype that was produced by pop culture by its overuse in television (reality & scripted) and movies. She does not exist. She is a caricature. Perez Hilton, I’m sorry but a stereotype lives in you. All Black Women do not act like that all the time. Please don't let pop culture fool you.

1.     Using fish and all its variation to mean Feminine infuriates me. Referring to things that are feminine as fishy is gross. One does not need to be a rocket science to know where that comes from. That is nasty. Are you saying being feminine is revolting? Please stop that. Also Okaay or Umkaaay belong in the 90’s, leave it there.

This blog is No Tea, No Shade but something I hope people can learn from. People like to say words may or may not hurt but they can get you or your feelings hurt. It’s just like the F-word that cause all kinds of controversy surrounding Isaiah Washington & T.R. Knight of Grey’s Anatomy fame. I didn't know that word was offensive until then. I grew up thinking it was cuss word but not thinking it was as unpleasant as the n-word for Black people. This blog is to get those who have these attitudes, thoughts and use these words and phrases to know it is not okay. A homosexual man reading the beginning probably didn’t like me calling folks “Jacks”. If that offends anyone, I do apologize. The gay men I know will tell you they have to fill in the blanks or give me definitions when I express my frustration with this topic. God is working on me and I hope he is working on you too.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Black Cowboys Salute

Other than the fact that I am a Texan, I did learn a little bit about Black Cowboys growing. My cousin DD and I were in my late Great Uncle’s (grandfather’s brother-in-law) car after school discussing & laughing about the movie, Blazing Saddles. We learned quickly Cleavon Little’s portrayal of the sheriff made him upset. It was a “disgrace to the boots”. My great uncle grew in West Texas where he knew quite a few cowboys. His uncle was a Black Cowboy. So that began our occasional education about Black Cowboys. As I got older, away from my car education, I read some books about them and I’ve gone to a few Black rodeos.

The Buffalo Soldiers originally were members of the U.S. 10th Cavalry Regiment of the United States Army, formed on September 21, 1866, at Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. This nickname was given to the "Negro Cavalry" by the Native American tribes they fought; the term eventually became synonymous with all of the African-American regiments formed in 1866. All of them didn’t stay in the service after the Civil War. Some did come West and served in the Army. Many of them settle West and became Cowboys.

The most famous of the Black Cowboys and Rodeo performers is Willie M. "Bill" Pickett also known as, Wild Bill Pickett. He left school in 5^th grade to work as a ranch hand. He learned to ride horses and steer longhorns. He invented the technique of bulldogging, the skill of grabbing cattle by the horns and wrestling them to the ground. It was known among cattlemen that, with the help of a trained bulldog, a stray steer could be caught. Pickett figured if a Dog could do it, well he could too. Pickett's method for bulldogging was biting a cow on the lip and then falling backward. Soon he became known for his tricks and stunts at local fairs. The name of Bill Pickett soon became synonymous with successful Rodeos. He did his bull-dogging act, traveling about in Texas, Arizona, Wyoming, and Oklahoma. He then became a popular performer who toured around the world and appeared in early motion pictures. Pickett was shown in a movie created by Richard E. Norman. Pickett's ethnicity resulted in him not being able to appear at many rodeos. He often was forced to claim that he was of Comanche Indian heritage to perform. In 1921, he appeared in the films The Bull-Dogger and The Crimson Skull. In 1932, after he retired from the Wild West Shows, Bill Pickett was killed when he was kicked in the head by a wild bronco. In 1971, he was inducted into the National Rodeo Cowboy Hall of Fame. In 1989, years after being honored by the National Rodeo Hall of Fame, Pickett was inducted into the Pro-Rodeo Hall of Fame and Museum of the American Cowboy at Colorado Springs, Colorado.

Gang of Roses is not as fictional as it seems. There were Black women in the “Wild, Wild” West. Most known is Stage Coach Mary. Mary Fields was a slave in Tennessee. After the Civil War, she made her way out West. She was the first African-American woman employed as a mail carrier in the United States, and just the second American woman to work for the United States Postal Service. Before her job with the Post Office, she was freed before slavery was outlawed in 1865. First working in the home of a Florida judge then after the judge’s wife she took the children to their aunt, Mother Mary Amadeus, the mother superior of an Ursuline convent in Toledo, Ohio. In 1884, Mother Amadeus was sent to Montana Territory to establish a school for Native American girls at St. Peter's Mission. Fields stood 6 ft. tall and weighed about 200 lbs. liked to smoke cigars, and was once said to be as "black as a burnt-over prairie black." She usually had a pistol strapped under her apron and a jug of whiskey by her side The Native Americans called Fields "White Crow" because "she acts like a white woman but has black skin." Local whites did not know what to make of her. In 1894, after several complaints and an incident with a disgruntled male subordinate that involved gunplay, the bishop ordered her to leave the convent. With help of Mother Amadeus, she opened a restaurant. Fields would serve food to anyone, whether they could pay or not, and the restaurant went broke in about ten months. In 1895, she was hired as a mail carrier because she was the fastest applicant to hitch a team of six horses. She never missed a day, and her reliability earned her the nickname "Stagecoach." Mary Fields died of liver failure in 1914. In the 1976 TV documentary South by Northwest, "Homesteaders", Fields was played by Esther Rolle, in the 1996 TV movie The Cherokee Kid, Fields was played by Dawnn Lewis, and in the 2012 TV movie Hannah's Law she was played by Kimberly Elise.

Cowboys including Black Cowboys are not a thing of the past. They are featured in many rodeos across the country. A hot name to know is Jason Griffin. I learned about him during a #BlerdChat on Twitter a few weeks ago. You can read about him Here. You’ll also learn about an Augusta State University history professor named Michael Searles, who preserves Black Cowboy with a lecture that brings black cowboys to life. Even wears clothing of the cowboy.

So I salute the Black Cowboys. Modern cowboys and movies like Posse, Buck, and Preacher and I will keep would you and your way of life alive.  All your names may not be known but we know you lived.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

 

Black History Month Salute

Why am I saluting Black Month? Every year I see or hear a Black person in a complaining tone ask, “Why is Black History in the shortest month of the year?”. I annoyingly sigh and explain. The “man” is not the cause of all the decision of black folks. I decided to explain Black History Month in a blog post. I know there is someone reading this shocked that someone Black does not know why February is Black History Month. Good for being shocked but just like the other heroes and sheroes in Black History that are not taught and/or learned about. The History of the month celebrating it is not taught or learned also.

Carter G. Woodson is known as the Father of Black History Month. He with the Association for the Study of Negro Life and History announced the second week of February to be "Negro History Week.", in 1926. That week in February was chosen because it marked the birthday of both Abraham Lincoln (the President that sign the Emancipation Proclamation, freeing the slaves) and Frederick Douglass (a Great Black American social reformer, orator, writer and statesman). The purpose of the event was to place emphasis on the teachings of the history American Black in the public school system. The first year was lukewarm. Only the school systems to cooperate were the states North Carolina, Delaware, West Virginia and the cities of Baltimore & Washington DC.  At the time of Negro History Week's launch Woodson contended that the teaching of black history was essential to ensure the physical and intellectual survival of the race within broader society:

"If a race has no history, it has no worthwhile tradition, it becomes a negligible factor in the thought of the world, and it stands in danger of being exterminated. The American Indian left no continuous record. He did not appreciate the value of tradition; and where is he today? The Hebrew keenly appreciated the value of tradition, as is attested by the Bible itself. In spite of worldwide persecution, therefore, he is a great factor in our civilization.”

Three years after Negro History Week was started, The Journal of Negro History commented on two officials with the State Departments of Educations of "every state with considerable Negro population" had made the event known to that state's teachers and distributed official literature associated with the event.". Churches were also (still are) instrumental in the awareness of Negro History Week. Soon enthusiastic response grew because of the efforts of the afore mentioned, other black organizations and progressive White interests and support. Negro History Week grew in popularity throughout the following decades, with mayors across the United States endorsing it as a holiday.

Black History Month was first proposed by The Black United Students at Kent State University in February of the year 1969. In the following year, the first celebration of Black History Month began. Six years later, as part of the United States Bicentennial, the informal expansion of Negro History Week to Black History Month was officially recognized by the U.S. government. President Gerald Ford spoke in regards to this, urging Americans to "seize the opportunity to honor the too-often neglected accomplishments of black Americans in every area of endeavor throughout our history."

Now that is the history of Black History Month. In researching my facts, I found out the USA is not the only country that celebrates it. Canada celebrates it in February, starting in 1995 and being unanimously officially approved by its Senate in 2008. The UK started celebrating 1987, in the month of October.

The video above is my nephew at his church miming this past Sunday. They were civil rights protestors. He is the third solo part with the faux hawk hair. Yes, I’m a proud aunt. Not only did he do a good job, All of the children were great. I also know that he is learning a little about his cultural history in church like his mom and I did as children.

One more Black History Salute to end the month. Figured out what happened to the Buffalo Soldiers yet.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms