The Word "Blerd"…Approved by Me

I knew that I was a nerdy and awkward somewhere around middle school. I was never going to be cool by Pop Culture's standards for being Christian, Black, Female, Living in the inner city, and whatever I was and now am.  So, I slowly came to grips with that. I had to because trying to be cool was making me stupid & depressed, just ask OutSpoken_Diva in the 5th grade (I call her Milk (I won’t do a blog on that name. Too painful to do. If you know it, You know it) and we all know I hate being stupid. And of course I knew I was black all my life. So, I am a Black Nerd. Last year I saw the term “Blerd” show up. I didn’t accept it at first. Even though I personally know many, I didn’t want to. Now I have embrace it as another description of being me.

I am a Black person that does not think that everything (just some things) needs a representative of every culture in it. Like why is there a Black KKK. What is the purpose?  Matter of fact there many things that is one sided culturally, especially television shows. There are many shows that I watch that I am okay black people are not main characters. I love “The Big Bang Theory” but I don’t think and black person is needed on that show. Number 1, I can put names to all of the characters, including myself and they all are black. Number 2, all the show heads will do is mess up and put a pop cultural black nerd representative version of Steve Urkel or Carlton Banks and screw the storyline up.  So when I first saw the word “Blerd”, I didn’t want to call myself that. I first saw it on Twitter and tweeted my feeling for the word. Pretty much saying “Do Black folks have “Black” up everything”. Well I only saw the word because I started engaging with other Black people who were awkward and nerd on social media. I was watching “Black Nerd Comedy” & “Lamarr Wilson” on YouTube. They keep me in stitches. Then I found a blog called “Black Girl Nerds” and that lead to more black nerds discussing a variety of everything. Then it hit me “Blerd” is not “blacking up” anything. Black Nerds just made a term to identify that there “people of color” that are nerds.

Just like everything, Pop Culture (yes I am very hard on pop culture, so what) has being a nerd is limited in its meaning also. Just like it has limited the meaning or Christian, Black, Female, well Everything. So it is safe to say being Black and Nerdy is limited even more. I just said the “representatives” are probably Steve Urkel & Carlton Banks (yeah I know a couple of those guys too) and that is probably the only image mainstream has put out for a long time. Most people don’t recognize Aisha Tyler or Donald Faison as Black Nerds. Blerd do. Blerds know their own. (Yes I am laughing after that last statement) I am glad Nerds of Color came up with the term “Blerd” before Pop Culture gets its mitts on it and bastardize it. So yes, I am OutSpoken_Diva and I am a Blerd. My story is not Pop Culture’s story for me. I define my own “Blerdness”.

So that’s my story. I’ll admit I’m embarrassed it took me a few months to accept the term. But it is here for me to accept and I can’t be embarrassed about that. Still don’t want a Black Bachelor. They gave us a couple. Yes they did!!! The first one was name Flava Flav. And yes that makes Black Bachelorette, New York. LMBO Oh wait before I go, here are Some of the Blerd Blogs & Vlogs I read & watch

http://www.blackgirlnerds.com/

http://blerdmediagroup.com/

http://geeksoulbrother.blogspot.com/

https://www.facebook.com/BlerdChat

http://www.youtube.com/user/wilsontech1

http://www.youtube.com/user/BlackNerdComedy

http://www.youtube.com/user/TheNerdElement

 Hope you enjoy.

 

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Nailed It!!!

Yes, I have been slacking on the beauty blogs. I’ve done Eye Shadow Allergy. Answered Eye shadow questions Here. And when I speak you’ve seen what might be on my mouth with a Lip Product Blog. Well, the person whose question started these blogs nicely reminded me that I have not finished. I still need to do nail care and face care blogs. This is maybe a tad helpful for me right now. For Lent, I gave up buying makeup. Last year I acquired many makeup products. I couldn’t go to Northpark Mall without a stop in Sephora. My coupon stash was full of makeup coupons. My makeup kits have quite a few new shades of everything. I knew I had a problem when this January I got a notice that Maybelline had lip gloss on sale on Amazon for $1.99 and with free shipping. I bought two. Did I need any of it? NO!!! So until after Easter, I will not buy myself any makeup. My mother needs a new Vitamin E stick so I’ll get her one, soon.

My nails are like my eyes & lips. My fingers like my eyes see color sometimes. Like my lips, my toes see color a lot.

From March until October I polish my toes. I live in Texas so during those months I am mostly in a toeless shoe of some sort in public. Also, I have talked about enough people with chipped polish on their toes and finger not for mine to be chipped up too. My man will never do the “Boomerang” to check on me and frown. Either they are polished or not.
These are my feet after getting my tattoo, six years ago. I told you, I’m never slipping. If they are chipped in public I have on closed-toe shoes.

Okay, you probably noticed I said I polish my nails. I do. My fingernails grow longish so I don’t wear artificial nails.

The last time I wore them was for a wedding I was in, in 2004, so roughly 10 years. I only get a professional manicure for maintenance twice a year. I do my own feet. If I can paint my own fingers I can paint my toes. Plus that’s a few dollars I keep in my pocket.

My Finger Nails are usually clear. I only like Red, Pink, or Coral on my fingers. I paint them in other colors and don’t recognize my hands. Plus Red Nails Match Everything!!! You can Never go Wrong with a Red Nail!!!

Now my feet have seen every color but black, green, and yellow. Like my lips, I don’t like those colors on them. In 2012 I found Salon Effects Real Nail Polish Strips and fell in love with them. I’m going to try “Out of Line" for Easter. They are like nail stickers but its real nail polish. Since I can coat my nails with solid colors on my own, I only buy the kind with designs. My Favorites are “I Love Love” and ”Sweet Tart-an”

(in which those cuss words discontinued my faves but I did find the new shade “Love Letter” for "I Love Love" & stocked up on Sweet Tart-an too help me from writing them a scathing email) They are so pretty.

But like many stories my life, Sally Hansen would keep my Epic nail fail “I Love Lacey”. It was pretty in the box but on my feet, grossness (my feet look weird). I think I disliked it so much I got up at 3 am on a Saturday morning and took it off and painted them red.

Okay My Tips for Nail Color Care

Wear Clear Polish - Using clear polish gives your nails a smooth, shiny finish and even if it does start chipping, no one will be able to tell. A good choice would be a nail hardening polish, which if applied daily will harden your natural nail.

Wash it Off - I don't paint my nails the neatest. Especially with my non-dominant (right) hand. When I get polish on my skin, I wait until all my nail and mistakes are dry and wash my hands and feet. Sometimes I wait to polish my nails two hours before my bath. It comes off the skin and your color is smudge-free.

Either Wear the Polish or Don't - If it is chipped, Take It Off!!! While you're sitting there watching TV you can take the polish off. Chipped polish is uncalled for.

Alright so that what my nails might look like as I sit and type to you guys. Actually, they are that  Revlon "African Tea Rose" (pink) color you see in the opening picture. So, let me go stretch. Any questions or comments leave them in the comments below.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Anita Hill Salute

Who in the early 90’s didn't know anything about Clarence Thomas and Anita Hill? Thurgood Marshall passed away, so there was a vacancy on the Supreme Court. George H. W. Bush, then president nominated a Clarence Thomas for the vacancy. Toward the end of the confirmation hearings, a FBI interview with Anita Hill was leaked. Hill, an attorney, had worked for Thomas at the Department of Education and had subsequently moved with Thomas to the EEOC. After the leak, Hill was called to testify at Thomas's confirmation hearings. She testified that Thomas had subjected her to comments of a sexual nature, which she felt constituted sexual harassment or at least "behavior that is unbefitting an individual who will be a member of the Court." Hill was the only person to testify at the Senate hearings that there had been unsolicited sexual advances. The final floor vote was: 41 Republicans and 11 Democrats voted to confirm while 46 Democrats and two Republicans voted to reject the nomination. Newspaper coverage of Thomas's private life was limited after he was confirmed. But more importantly the conversation and laws about sexual harassment have change. For me personally it introduced me into the worlds of Misogyny and The Battle of the Sexes.

I was a young girl in the salon one day when Anita Hill came up. It was the popular topic at the time. Okay, the salon I went to then was half salon and half barber shop. Ms. M and Ms. C were the stylist. Ms. M did my hair then. Ms. C also worked at the Post Office. Mr. L was the barber. Well, that day it was a few men in the barber area and the topic came up. Well Mr. W who was retired from the railroad, said “That Anita Hill ain’t doing nothing but the work for the white man, trying to keep the Black man down”.  Ms. C jumped up and said “Do what? So, you think she’s lying” He said “Yeah, She lying. Sexual Harassment that some White boy sh*t” Before I knew it, I was being rushed under the dryer for 20 minutes by Ms. M and she joined in. After that 20 minutes under the hair dryer, they were still “discussing” that topic. Ms. C was breaking down how men told dirty jokes all the time at the expense of their female colleagues. Sometimes when delivering mail how she had been cat called. Mr. W was steady saying that was different. Ms. M was steady asking how it was any different. Then she called him a hypocrite. She pointed at me and said, “You always telling little girls like her, not to let little boys talk to you anyway and paw at you on the street, but it’s okay for a grown man to do the same then to a grown woman”. I was sitting there thinking (with my nose in a magazine because back then children were seen not heard in adult conversations) “She’s right”. Mr. W was silent after that. But Ms. C. finally said “So it ain’t just White boy sh*t, Black men do some vulgar sh*t too. And that woman was right to tell what he did. Maybe they will give him the “right” clerk in the Supreme Court and he figure how to change his conversation”. And that was the end of discussion and I finished getting my hair done by Ms. M and Mr. L went back to cutting another man’s hair. Yeah I missed the middle, but I have a feeling I came in on the important parts.

I don’t know what it is about men that think they can say any old thing to women. Cat Calling, Dirty Jokes, and random inappropriate touching are some of the most vulgar things women must endure from men. Ms. M was right. Many older men like Mr. W would tell girls and young women not to let guys do those things. My grandfather constantly drilled us not to answer to some guy honking his horn at us and warned my male cousins not to honk their horns at women. That was rare. Most men didn’t tell the boys anything like that. Boys will be boys was the name of the game and the game is still being played. The same boys that whistle at and hit girls on the butt are same ones that tell filthy jokes and pass dirty emails to their female subordinates. These same men are shocked about being called into HR about sexual harassment. What do you mean they are wrong? They’ve been allowed to act like that for years. After all these sexual harassment laws were passed and a clear definition of sexual harassment was set I playfully thought about suing the boys that slapped me on the butt or touched my breast without being asked. I think that would have gave them the right message that me angrily cussing and punching them was not giving. Yeah, the thought or suing crossed my mind again. D-word court cost is what hinders me.

So yeah, I salute Anita Hill and any woman not taking men’s vulgar crap from them anymore. It may have been on Capitol Hill, a courtroom, HR, a barber shop or a street corner. Women are not having it.  Men need to know that this is not allowed. Everywhere is not a porn film, strip club, bedroom, or the lewdness in their minds. Women should be Respected. Sad, we have to go to these kind of measures to demand it.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Ok Class! Today's Lesson, A Sex Tape!!!

Just last night Bestie Boo, LJ and I were talking last night about me being a prude. We agreed that I have "prudish moments". I call it "Clutch My Pearls Time". Then this morning I hear about a teacher accidentally showing her middle school students her sex tape. Here's the Article. Well it's "Clutch My Pearls Time".

All I could do was sigh. I totally believe it was an accident. I believe if she was trying to lure a child she would have done it in a small setting not the whole class. I maybe being naïve but I will accept her doing this on accident. My question is "Why does she have a sex tape"? Not because she is a teacher but because she is a human. Has anyone learned anything from the celebrities? Am I the only one that has learn "Sex Tapes Will Be Seen, No Matter What"? If she didn't have a sex tape, she would not have shown it to her students. No one at this point in history show still be making or own a sex tape. If you still have sex tape go get and smash it and all (yes All) the copies because it will be seen by eyes that it was not intended for. Those eyes may see it by accident like these students. Those eyes may see it because the person you made the tape with is braggingly showing people. I have seen a few sex tapes and that is how I saw them. One of the "stars" was showing it off to an audience and the other "star" didn't know. So go smash, burn, and destroy your sex tapes.

And before you ask, "No I have not destroyed my sex tape because i don't have one". I think they are stupid and don't need to know what I look like having intercourse. If you see me in one, Let Me Know!!! I Promise any and everybody, that that person will feel some kind of pain. Pain to the body, Pain to the finances, or Pain to their reputation. So let's pray I am not "starring" in any. I'm unclutching my pearls now. This prudish moment is over.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Help Me Understand: The Barbie Back Lash

.

I had a few Barbie dolls. I had a Happy Holidays one,

a Nigerian one,

and a Malibu one.

I even had the “Barbie-like” doll “Lookin’ Smart Maxie.

I had lots of dolls growing up. I was, no, I am very girly. So stereotypically, that included playing with dolls. Oh I loved playing church with my dolls, because that was the only way “playing church” was allow at our home.

Okay I said I’m “girly”, so maybe I’m not as “feminist” as others. Another thing I am confused about with the “feminist” agenda is its anti-Barbie stance. I get that girls need positive images to look up to. That is Very important. But Barbie is not positive because of the way she looks. These “suggested” Barbie-like dolls

are better because they supposedly looks like what average women look like. Wow, that is interesting.

I’ll say it. It’s a doll. Barbie is a doll. Barbie is a toy. Amazing how no one is upset with all these jobs she has had. Here is a partial list.

Aerobics instructor

Art teacher

Dance teacher

Elementary teacher

Special Education Teacher

Yoga Teacher

Gymnastics Coach

Football Coach

Dentist

Doctor

Nurse

Surgeon

Veterinarian

Ballerina

Fashion Model

The average woman is not doing all those jobs. She doesn’t have the time like Barbie has. The stress of all these jobs would kill the average woman. Well they all would kill me at least. Also do all these “suggested” dolls have Barbie’s career credentials? I bet they don’t.

Poor Barbie she gets all the blame. That cute little 6 year old Outspoken_Diva, above, used to sneak these two in church.

So do we blame the Strawberry Shortcake dolls for her church mischief? I do own many fruity fragrant body sprays. Interesting!

This Hugga Bunch doll, is she the cause for my Plus Size look? Her name was Tickles. She was sadly decapitated by my cousin, DD. I loved this doll. Might explain this hairstyle that I wear often. LoL

Oh all the negative images girls take in daily, a doll is one of the causes. Help me understand, why.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

The Story Behind “Yes, Yes, Yes”

Last month I wrestled with releasing two blogs. This one and one about funeral gossipers. Funeral gossipers, stop that crap. Asking me questions before, all through & after the service. I always attract one. This time I semi-avoided one for one to come sit right beside my sister and me. I see so and so way over there on the other side of the building, up in the balcony. Maybe I’ll get to speak to them AFTER the services.  I don’t know if so and so is still with so and so. No, I ain’t heard from so and so, stop asking me about them. Oh if we are friendly, maybe talk on Social Media sometime, you can do a little catching up. This last one I was around those people too. I always enjoy a joke of two for this one lady I know. She always cracks me up. As for folks I have not seen & talked to in years, “Be Quiet” & “Stop Being Nosey”. Ok that’s enough of that. Quite a few folks get that "Shaddup" look because of that. Now y’all see why people think I’m a jerk. I know y’all, I’m trying to be more tolerant.

Now onto today’s blog. Okay maybe you have noticed on Social Media, especially if you know me offline and you are a Facebook friend, that I have be using the phrase “Yes, Yes, Yes”, when I agree with something. It is a New personal joke. And I have decided to tell you the story behind it.

So last month, the pastor of my foundation church passed away. I went to the wake and the funeral. The services were very befitting of him. It was not a "funeral" but a "Celebration of Life". Oh and I actually saw My Funeral Fantasy come true. (When my mother passes, I want my siblings & me to view the body last when we come in. Last as in all our relatives view before us, also. I hate being touched.) Well the song the eulogist sang to close out the funeral was “I Know the Lord Will Make a Way”. Here are the lyrics.

Verse
I know the Lord will make a way, yes, He will.
I know the Lord will make a way, yes, He will.
He'll make a way for me and for you,
Jesus will see you safely through;
I know the Lord will make a way, yes, He will.


Chorus
Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

Yes, He will,
yes, He will,
yes, He will.

I know the Lord will make a way,
oh yes, He will.

(He'll make a way)
yes, yes, yes.

(for me and for you)
yes, yes, yes.

(Jesus will see you)
yes, yes, yes.

(safely through)
yes, yes, yes.

I know the Lord will make a way,
oh yes, He will.

Dear readers, I found out I have been singing this song wrong all my life. Where the lyrics say “Yes, Yes, Yes” I had been singing “Yes, Lord, Yes”. Matter fact at some point in life I might have been singing “Yes, Lawd, Yes”. I really like this song. My heart gets lots of joy singing this song. All my life, I have been wrong. It was like my ears and eyes were finally in tune with what everybody was singing. I wanted to laugh so hard at myself but I was at a funeral. That was not the time to laugh. (They might have thought I was in “holy laughter”. Yeah I know I’m reaching.)

So now when you see “Yes, Yes, Yes”, you can laugh along with me. I give you permission this time. Key phrase is This Time. You have to laugh at yourself. It is stupid to take yourself serious all the time. If you sometimes do silly thing like I do, it is downright crazy to take yourself serious all the time. But I know the Lord will make a way for me to stop doing such silly things so more. Oh yes he will, Yes! Yes, Yes, Yes!!!


Oh the latest profile picture is what I actually look like on that day. I call it the "Bapti-Costal" LMBO Yes, Yes, Yes,
  As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

 

 

Time for March

March is Women's History Month so get ready for a few blogs featuring Woman Champions and also a “Help Me Understand”. Let’s just say this “Help Me Understand” has a love/hate relationship that I don’t get.

March is also National Nutrition Month.  We including me need to eat better. I’ve been using a Pinterest for my food diary. OMG it is so effective because I actually see that I eat crappy and I’m a Nutritional Consultant. We have to do better. 

National Reading Day is March 2. As an Avid reader I urge you to READ. Reading is so important. Too many people don't read. I believe Don't Read and Can't Read are the same thing. Either way you are Not reading!

National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day is March 10. Again it’s sad to me that there has to be any Awareness days ever but this one saddens me the most. Why? The stats that says women account for about 1 in 4 new HIV/AIDS cases in the United States. And of these newly infected women, about 2 in 3 are African-American. Everyone should frown. The fact that HIV/AIDS exist should make us frown.

March 10^th is also my anniversary of me being “Radical”. If by now you don’t know what “Radical” for me is, shame on you. Go Read what it is Here. Not telling you the number, this the internet. March 10^th is not the day I decided to go Radical. I have no clue what day that was. I was going through then so all the days ran together then. March 10^th was the last day I was Not Radical. Why do I called it “Being Radical?”

1.  The method. There wasn’t one. I just did it.

2.   For some odd reason not doing it is strange, uncommon, weird, crazy, drastic, dramatic… Radical

Was I planning to make it to make it this long? NO!!! But some time in, I realized I could not just give it up all willy nilly. This was really part of my life.  Do I regret it? NO!!! I have gotten so much sleep since going Radical. Yes, I am laughing, too. Seriously, I have my days, weeks, and months that I think I went crazy. Then I think “No, Crazy was those years ago when you didn’t see the "Real" you when you looked in the mirror. Crazy was when I was crying all the time because I was connected to those that had unplugged from me and was too dumb not realize it. I think I'm a better person for it. So will "Radical" make it to next year? I don't know. I am human. God willing, YES!!!

So, that is the month of March. Go celebrate the ladies. Eat Better. Read, it Fundamental. Don’t have sex or at least Protect yourself having it. Those last statements seem so cliché. Oh well it gets my point across.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms