Rape Culture (I Blame Pop Culture)

Rape culture links rape and sexual violence to the culture of a society, and in which prevalent attitudes and practices normalize, excuse, tolerate, and even condone rape. And we thank Wikipedia for their definition. Rape Culture is

·           Blaming the Victim, the victim’s clothing, time the victim was out, how much did the victim drank in alcohol, did the victim know the rapist

·           When a Group of men & boys have "gang bang" sex on a girl. The guys get arrested yet still people ask “Where was the girl’s parents”?

·           "Men can’t be raped by Women"

·           Children well under the age of consent thinking having sex at that age is normal

·           Seduction is romantic

·           Watching a sex tape of an R&B crooner, saying that he did it yet still buying his music (I’m not a hypocrite because I am a hypocrite. I was still a fan of Trapped in the Closet Chapters for a minute after finally seeing the tape) music. Umm don’t you think the true public opinion didn’t sway the case

·           Men cat-calling and harassing women as the walk down the street

·           Young men being taken to prostitute because they are "too old to be a virgin"

·           Girls not being allowed to wear legging to school because it entices the boys & male teachers

·           Boy slapping girls on the butt or grabbing their breast and running off like it’s their free for all right to grope

·           Women just now being thought of as child molesters & rapists

·           The term “underage sex worker” instead of “child trafficking victim”

·           20 different ways women have been taught to avoid rape, while barely anyone is teaching men NOT TO RAPE

·           Asking “Were any of the rapist’s victims, prostitutes or strippers”?

·           Video games are created that allow players to rape other player’s characters… for amusement

·           Men plan out their rapes in advance by carrying rape drugs with them

·           When Rappers don’t understand putting drugs in a person’s drink, taking that person anywhere to have sex, have sex with said person and “they don’t even know it” is Wrong

·           When the President of France attacks a random stranger in his hotel room and gets away with it, cause “women always want sex.”

·           Arizona publishes the names and addresses of rape victims

·           When universities give women students rape whistles to stop rape

·           “You know you want it” because of these “Blurred Lines”

·           Believing men are wild animals unable to control their sexual urges

·           Detention centers and communities allowing undocumented women to be raped because the fear of deportation keeps them from reporting

·           One Month Rape Sentences

·           Child Brides not Sex Slaves

·           Rape Culture is made up by Angry Feminists

Did I miss any? Let me know in the comments. And what has Pop Culture done to stop any of this? How much of it has Pop Culture promoted, itself?  I’ll let you answer that.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

It's Easter Time!!!

I've told you before here in this BLOG, Easter is my Favorite Holiday. Today is Good Friday. It's the day Christian commemorate the Death of Jesus Christ. Easter is the day we celebrate He Rising from the Grave. When I was younger I thought Good Friday was a holiday the Baptist (That's was what I was growing up) got off from work & school. I was 12 when I found out that I was wrong. We didn't go to school because my mother took the day off and she used that time for us to get our hair done and other decorating chores for Sunday. So on Good Friday that is what I still do. Today, I started some of my décors. I picked some flowers out of one of my grandmother's garden.

Made an arrangement for the coffee table.

Also, put out a little candy for the family.

Tomorrow I'll start part of the dinner. Dinner will be

Ham

(We only get it 2-3 times a year)

Potato Salad

Green Bean Casserole

Apple Pie

(The Farewell to Baking Season Dessert).

Pretty much every year Ham, Potato Salad, a hot vegetable Side dish, and dessert. The decorating & the meal are easy. That's one of the reasons why it's my favorite. It's not so commercial so all the hustle & bustle is deleted for me.

I think the meaning of the holiday has always warmed my heart. This week my aunt sent out an Inspiration message that contained the scripture I learn when I was in daycare. It brought so many fun memories to my mother and I this week. The scripture is:

“For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures.”
 

(1 Corinthians 15:3–4, NIV)

My mother cracked up when she read that. Every day in devotion we did this scripture at daycare. I loved to recite it. It had choreography

Put your arms out like a cross (Christ Died)

Point to yourself (For Our Sins)

Make a book or Bible with your hands (According to the Scriptures)

Bend and Point Down (He was Buried)

Bring your Body and finger back up (Rose again)

Hold up three fingers (Third day)

Make a book or Bible with your hands (According to the Scriptures)

My mother said that I was so little that she didn't understand what I was saying until she asked the teacher was "According to the Scriptures". It's refreshing to know I was taught at an early age the true meaning of Easter. Because 1 Corinthians 15:3–4, is just that, plain and simple. Okay, now I'm going to dry my eyes.

Happy Easter!!!

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Alright, Scandal Season 3 Finale Talk

First I would like Thank God, For he is the head of my life. I also thank him for my father, Track & Field Nerd & my mother, Basketball Thug. I know my father was not there mostly but he was not Maya Pope. Also I know my mother didn’t like most of the guys my sister & I brought home but she Never killed any of their family members to get us away from them. She's not Rowan "Eli" Pope. Neither one of them thought to say “Olivia, stop being with the President. Just scheme, scheme, kill the son, lock the other parent back up, & daughter finally leaves TV POTUS. I think the only person that has worse parents than Olivia Pope is Clarisse “Precious” Jones.

This was the most twisted, sickest, vile, episode, to date. Poor Mama Pope she got to play outside for a little while. But like little sheltered children, she went too far and acted up and got sent to back to her room. I knew she was never dead for the 2^nd time. I clearly said on Twitter (Oh I live tweet during the show. I live tweet during Grey’s Anatomy also.), “Nope, I want to see Maya's body "Maya Pope is Dead"”. We could’ve thought they killed her and next season we would hear, “Hi Livie”, because that tough bird refused to die and we end up having heart attacks. At least now that she is away in a hole. If she gets out this time, we, the audience, were not fooled into believing she was dead.

Poor Mellie, Bless her heart (and not in the Southern Sense). Oh the guilt of a secret. I think the real healing for the Grants will have to come from Mellie. Too bad, Big Jerry, Fitzgerald Grant II is dead. So we can’t have a show down with him. Now that the secret is out, real healing can began. I do want some more remorse for Fitz because the way he hurled insults at Mellie when he found out about Andrew and her was revolting. I want him racked with pain for speaking to his raped wife like that. I don’t care if he didn’t know.

So, Cyrus Beene finally realized he was soul less. Episodes back after he had his husband killed and he finally broke down because James was dead, I laughed. I hope he finds or buy back his soul. And maybe Sally Langston can come on as a cabinet member in the next Fitz, TV POTUS administration. She is funny to me. The TV White House needs one Bama Bat crap, Crazy member in it. I mean can you imagine a diplomatic meeting without a little "Time for your slaughter, piggy piggy!" and "Yum, yum, crispy piggy. Yum, yum!”

Quinn Truly Loves Huck. When you love someone enough to know you might have to lose them, You Love that person. Quinn turn over the folder containing his family’s where about to him. That’s Love!!! I don’t care if Huck gets back with his family for emotional sake. I just want to not see any more intimate scene between Quinn & Huck ever again. If reuniting him with his family will do that, good!!! Shonda Rhimes, Make That Stop, Forever!!!

Oh here is a note:

Thank you Jake!!!

Love,

David Rosen

Harrison is a Schrodinger’s Cat paradox. We don’t know if he is dead (Number 186 for Eli Pope. Jerry was number 185) or alive (To go back to Pope & Associates or Work for B613). I know one thing, Columbus Short better get his “Scandal” together because Shonda Rhimes is not above getting rid of his butt. Call Isiah Washington and ask him how she acts. Get it together. You’re the only OUTSPOKEN_DIVA approved hunk on the show.

Olivia will be back. She hit the Ignore button on the Grants, this time. Maybe after she fixes herself, she come back. Maybe she won’t fix herself at all and come back. Either way, Olivia Pope Will Be Back!!!

Okay let’s talk about the underlying lesson to be learned from Season 3 of Scandal. The Power of the Puh is Dangerous. It is so dangerous that:

·         Grown man will run around frightened when people say it is coming to the USA

·         Stab it’s lover and leave him dying in the floor

·         Steal secrets from its secondary lover which will anger him and cause him to put his hand around its throat (Jake has domestic violence traits).

·         Cause its husband to shoot its true love

·         Threaten its lover with a gun

·         Have its daddy kill the offspring of its married lover

·         Get itself Killed (RIP Adnan Salif)

·         Get itself locked up again

The Power of the Puh is dangerous. Umm yeah, I was talking about three different ones. People, if you don’t learn anything form Scandal. Sex can get you killed.

So that’s my take on the Scandal Season 3 finale. What’s your take? Leave it in the comments below. Now let me get ready to start to say good bye to Christina Yang on Grey’s Anatomy, next week. I’ll be back to talk about it.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

Sex Tapes to Relevancy (I Blame Pop Culture)

I had to view the trailer to one of the reality shows that makes me flee from social media when it is on TV because y’all want to talk shower rods & this show. (Umm who is the “human rat” guy? And when did Li’l Boosie put on that kind of weight?) Then because of autoplay on Facebook, I saw the sex tape (and the shower rod) trailer talked about on the Love & Hip Hop Atlanta trailer. Ok, the lady knows how to pick out sturdy shower accessories. She gets a thumbs up from me on that. Now what she does with the shower rod *sigh* is going to be mimicked by the freaky and her infamy will rise.

The first one I remember was Tommy Lee & Pamela Anderson. This was pre-internet and the media & gossip was all a buzz about it. It also received a healthy dose of shame. Then was the R. Kelly one that everyone claims to watch, said it was him, but… Let me stop let’s just say I’ll be bringing this tape up again in a blog about Rape Culture. Then the person who has become one the most famous names out right now because of a sex tape, Ms. Kim Kardashian. Honestly, I have never watched whatever she did with Ray J. It’s been talked about enough, I feel I don’t need to.

It is sad to me sex tapes get your name out there in Pop Culture. There are many. Some are leaked. Some are put out on purpose. I just don’t want young people to think sex taping is the truest way to stardom. It’s like sex tapes are the newest way to “sleep your way to the top”. No one needs to know how your personal “Home Depot mixes the Paint in the Bucket”. People need to know of all the sex tapes out there how many people have made it to relevancy in Pop Culture. The number is very few. Tommy Lee & R. Kelly was already famous. R. Kelly almost went to prison *sigh* because of one. Kim K has a reality show but is constantly reminded by the Pop Culture media how she got her fame. And as for this Mimi person, it’s not looking good for her according to talk among my FBF that watches the show. Seems like she is a bit of a liar when it comes to talking about this tape.

I’m no hypocrite because I am a hypocrite. Without sex tapes, the world would have never met The Golden Sisters. That’s them above viewing Kim K & Ray J’s tape. Those ladies crack me up. Sex Tapes do not. Let’s show the real damage that these things truly cause and stop glorifying them like works of art.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

"I Blame Pop Culture" (New Blog Series Announcement)

If you follow me on Twitter, Here, you already know how hard I am on Pop Culture. Pop Culture has defined everything in our lives and all of its definitions are not positive. I am sick of it and this blog series is me taking a stand.

When I say Pop Culture, I'm not talking just what is "Trending". Thanks to Wikipedia, Popular Culture is the entirety of ideas, perspectives, attitudes, memes, images, and other phenomena that are within the mainstream of a given culture, especially Western culture of the early to mid 20th century and the emerging global mainstream of the late 20th and early 21st century. Heavily influenced by mass media, this collection of ideas permeates the everyday lives of the society.  So basically, Pop Culture consists of the attitudes, customs, and beliefs that distinguishes one group of people from another that is appealing to the general public.

This will be an ongoing series. I'll spread my discussions out and not put them all out all at once. Topics will include:
American Dieting
Being Christian
College
Masculine/Feminine
Not Really a Nerd
Not Black Enough
Sex Tape to Relevancy
Rape Culture
Reality Shows
Romance/Dating
and many more. Also I will prepare you for me stating "I'm no hypocrite because I am Hypocrite". Pop Culture has made a one out of all of us. So while I'm discussing my issues with Pop Culture, I'll have to reveal how I was caught up in the hype of some of it also. Hey, I'm no hypocrite because I am Hypocrite. LoL

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms

April is National Poetry Month (Poetry Corner)

Today, I was reminded that April is National Poetry Month.  I told you guys in the blog Why The Name OUTSPOKEN_DIVA, that OUTSPOKEN_DIVA was originally my pen name. I also said I would share some of my poetry one day. Today is that day. I will share 3 of them and include a short prose how they came to be.

1. Worthy of Price In undergrad at Lamar University, I had HATERS. Yes, I have those. I just don't complain about them like... One guy didn't understand why I didn't have low self-esteem because I was Fat. A couple of members of a sorority referred to me as "Dyme Piece" (that song was new & popular, then) because I thought, No Wait I knew I was Cute (I had a knack to dress up for no reason at all). And the list went on and on. By the time I learn any of this I was weeks from graduating, so I wasn't bothered badly. This poem was born one night after a passing some of my Haters.



Worthy of Price

Now, I know no one told You

That All Women

Should have "GREAT" self-esteem

But I know you thought

The One who covers her body

The One who won't wear makeup

The Fat, Big Boned, or Thick One

The Quiet One or Shy One

Did Not value themselves

PLEASE!!!

So What you whisper, you wonder why she think she thinks she is a "Diva or "Dyme"

Why shouldn't she

She May Think

Others can be the Dyme

But your Life isn't even the Down Payment for a Look from her

Infinity is her Value

Her price tag is Endless

Not to be Bought

Of her you can't make change

Everybody is so why can't she be

"Worthy of the Price"

© Copyright 2003

Praise and Worship Crush On New Year's Eve 2004, was the first night I went with my BFF named Football Nerd to the church we attend now. The church is a mega-church but for the first year we sat around the same people. That included a man whose worship for God was very attractive. New Year's Eve 2005, I figured out that the lady and the children with him was his family. Whoops!!! LMBO

Praise and Worship Crush

You caught my eye

Not with your looks

Not your style or dress

But with your Worship

Your Worship to the most high God

I was wiping my eyes of joyous tears

And I saw you go beyond the veil

You looked so peaceful

Like you were happy to be there

Like Worship is second nature

You Worship makes me want to join you

Join you in Worship, Praise, Glorifying

Our Mighty God

Who is this tugging on my blouse?

Oh Praise & Worship Period is over

I'm the Only one standing

Standing, Watching you Worshi---Sit down

Let me Pay Attention to Service

Instead of you my Praise and Worship crush

© Copyright 2006

A Whole Love Let's just say I don't believe in 50-50 in a romantic relationship. A man needs to bring all of him because I will be bringing all of me. Oh and this one rhymes!!!

A Whole Love

100 Percent

Love that's decent

Love that's Sweet

And truly Complete

Not Half and Half

Please, Don't make me laugh

Don't want Half your heart

But the Whole body part

Not 50/50

That's not me

A Love that is Real

Something I can feel

That's what's wrong with us

Can you, I trust

I have no clue

'Cause I don't have all of you

Only Whole men can come to the table

To help fix a guy, I'm no longer able

Only a Whole woman and a Whole man

Should be able to walk Hand in Hand

To give Love that is Whole

Will we ever be so Bold

© Copyright 2005

So, that's some of my poetry. Hope you enjoyed it. Maybe from time to time I might share more. Maybe a short story, sometime, also.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms



My Theme Song

Today on Facebook I saw a post that said “What is the song that describes you”. Oh all the songs I have on my Getting Ready playlist (Sacred or Secular) the only song that would come to my mind is the one above these words. It’s called “Nothing to Lose” by The Clark Sisters. It written by Elbernita “Twinkie” Clark, who is on the organ (Remember her name in June).  The main lyrics simply say:

I have walked in the rain
Like Paul, I have strained
I have even felt drained, Yes I Have

I have had a taste of sorrow
From the past I had borrowed
And somehow I always felt
That there was hope for tomorrow

Jesus, Unhooked the chains
And my Lord, eased the pain


And He gave me nothing to lose
But all, to gain

If there is ever a movie made of my life this song needs to be a part of the soundtrack. Matter of fact it is listed in this Blog as the closer. Why is it the closer? Have you ever had a Great feeling and thought wow one day I’ll feel like this forever? Well, when this like is over I believe we will get our just reward. Now if at the end of this life that is not the case I’ll eat crow then. But until then that is what I will believe and will continue to believe. Trouble can’t last always. All the no’s, the yes’s & maybe’s thAT turn in no’s, the heart aches, strife and hardships that everyone including ourselves cause can’t be forever. That song tells me I am not the only one that know there is hope in another day. That makes me smile through anything.

So if you ever hear me play “Southern Girl” by Erykah Badu, “Ebony Eyes” by Stevie Wonder or “Happy and You Know It” by Vickie Winans know that these might have me bouncing around relating to them but there is one song that keeps me going for the long haul. Yes, Ms. Twinkie Clark, God gave me nothing to lose but All, to gain.

So what’s your theme song? Tell me in the comments. And just because it’s not a gospel song don’t be shamed into not listing it. What describes you, Describes you and your story.

As Always, Talking to You in Adult Terms